Take things easy, Edna

"Take things easy Edna,
You've had a bad fall."
"Poppycock, I'll be right as rain.
I'm going to tour Greece, the coast of Spain,
Come summer."

"But Edna, you're getting on now."
"Cobblers, I just need a sherry.
More exercise, more Grayson Perry.
I want to go to the opera, the ballet.
The season's just begun."

"Take things easy Edna,
You're not getting any younger."
"I want to stay young, not be dull any longer.
I'm going out to dinner tonight,
With all my friends, my family."

"But Edna you're getting on now."
"Rubbish you're as young as you feel.
I'm thinking of getting a scooter,
Getting out more, sounding my hooter.
I need the fresh air now the weather's improving."

"But Edna we were right,
You collapsed last night.
And now we face the funeral parlour."
But even I did not expect to see
A wine glass thrust right out to me,
From coffin lid as Edna went
Quite drunk as she was heaven sent !