The Beautiful Game

By Jane Hyphen

Tue, 17 Sep 2013
  • 969 reads
2 comments
 

Chiseled-legged role model

Sliding tackle, bluffers hobble

Gold chain, groin strain

Satin strip, flesh stained

VIP, transfer fee

Seven figure salary

Plebs like us pay to see

He does so much for charity

 

Queuing at the turnstile

Stanley knife, Chelsea smile

There's no true fans on armchairs

Get a ticket, stand and swear!

Croupy cries, grey skies

Purple fingers, Pukka Pies

 

You only sing when you're winning

Seats and evil, seats are evil

Three carat diamond studded earring

Defence is useless, goalie's feeble

Relegation, going down

Sack the manager again

All he does is chew and frown

Smash the missus she's to blame

 

Chest butting, ear biting

Rollered turf's alright for fighting

Wax-chested flick-flack

Sportsmanship is topless boasting

Who's the wanker in the black

Those girls were gagging for a roasting

Away fixtures, eager slags

Nasty blisters, disposable WAGS

 

The anonymity of tribes

Painted faces, racist jibes

Bring your sons and make them tough

John Terry, Brian Clough

They have to grow up hard like you

My old man to be a .....

Remember Justin Fashanu?

 

Georgy Best, legendary

Maradona, Lionel Messi

Those distant days of 66

Geoff Hurst, Bobby Moore

You're not singing anymore

You're not singing anymore

 

Certificate 18
Poem
Bastards
Unclassified

Comments

Submitted by Bee on

I thought this was great! 

Very well done!

Bee

Submitted by Jane Hyphen on

Oh thanks Bee! I grew up in a football obsessed household. I've got daughters now so it's sort of faded from my life but I'm still fascinated by football culture and how it connects us with a more tribal past. And the ghastly elements too, now so endemic in the modern game.