Scrap 53

SCRAP 53
Frank has been helping Scotty did a big hole in his back garden. Dawn decided that she wanted a fish pond. Fortunately the garden is big enough to take the spoil which has been deposited all around the edges underneath the privet hedges.
Frank has managed to ‘find’ a large amount of plastic sheeting, which they have placed in the hole and they are watching as the water level slowly rises, trickling from the hose which they have connected to the tap over the kitchen sink.
Dawn sends one of the children out with cans of Worthington ‘E’ which are almost cold enough to enjoy, having been stored in the old larder. The pals make themselves comfortable on old car seats propped against the wall and drain a can each before opening their second.
‘Next she’ll be wanting a fountain I suppose,’ grumbles Scotty, ‘this is costing me a fortune what with the plants and the fish. Why she wants a garden pond I will never know.’
Dawn sticks her head out the kitchen window and calls out: ‘I heard that. I just want the place to look nice after the kids wrecking everything. They can play down the swing park from now with all the other kids. This is going to be the best kept garden on the estate.’ She disappears back inside and Scotty gives a shrug. ‘The Council are running a competition,’ he explains, ‘and for some reason Dawn has decided she is going to win it. She is determined to beat Hazel Smith from next door. They fell out over something and nothing and anything Hazel gets Dawn wants the same only bigger and better.’
Frank finishes his third can and looks around for another. Scotty is still on his second so he takes the only remaining one, unnoticed. ‘That’s an odd family, the Smiths, isn’t she the one whose sister-in-law is also her mother or something?’ Scotty tries to explain but he too gets muddled. ‘Scott of the Antarctic has a brother, Lawrence of Arabia and they married Laurel and Hazel Smith, but their name is Smith as well so that confuses the issue all the more.’
Frank’s brain is whirring, ‘so Scott and Lawrence are brothers, they are also brothers-in-law and Scott is Lawrence’s step father-in-law, right?’ Scotty considers this for a moment before agreeing. Frank continues: ‘that makes Lawrence and Hazel’s kids the niece and nephew of their own cousins and Lawrence is their father and Scott is their uncle and their step grandfather?’ Scotty frowns, ‘something like that, and anyhow it’s too complicated for me.’
They sit in silence as they try to figure out the complications of two brothers marrying a mother and daughter but the effort proves too much and they turn their attentions back to the current business.
‘Is that my last beer you’re drinking?’ Scotty feigns annoyance and calls for his eldest son to take a jug over to the pub and get it filled with a quart of cold bitter. He gives him some change and tells him to spend the rest on sweets for the children.
The pond is slowly filling, the water swirling round some leaves which have blown in on the wind. ‘You’re going to need a pump and filter as well as the fountain,’ Frank observes, ‘otherwise it’ll soon get filthy and smelly.’ Scotty is mentally adding up the list of expenses which are growing all the time. ‘It’s a good thing I’m doing that Holland run. I should get a nice bonus for that.’ Frank is concerned for his friend. Nicking motors and diesel is one thing but importing illegal substances is out of his league. Scotty sees the look of concern on his face and tries to reassure him. ‘I did a run last month and nothing happened. How do you think I found the money for the minibus?’
Frank is not the only person who has wondered where the money came from. ‘You wanna be careful what you spend it on mate,’ he warns. ‘The cops are going to notice if you start spending loads of dosh, especially with Ginger Jarvis sticking his nose in.’
The boy has brought the bitter and two glasses. His pockets are stuffed with sweets and as soon as the beer is handed over he disappears to share out the booty. ‘You worry too much,’ says Scotty, as he pours the beer into the pint glasses, ‘drink up and enjoy the sunshine.’