Westons Go West 13 -Part 1

January, 10, 1880

With the new year and decade, a new President was ordained to replace Brigham Young. For too long his role had been left vacant, but it was now filled by John Taylor (pictured above).

New problems were happening in the Weston household as well. First of all, Simon came home with the announcement that one of the highest priests in the Ogden area, Joseph Black,  had approached him, hoping that they would agree for him to  become engaged to their daughter, Alice, aged 12.

“I cannot believe that you would even consider such a thing, Simon. First of all she is far too young, and even if she weren't, she isn't a commodity to be bargained for. When and if she marries, it will be to whom she wishes, not because of the church’s hierarchy who feel they have to be responsible for populating the world,” said Mary.

“Mr. Black is not all that old, Mary – only in his early 40's, and although he already has two wives, he is much taken by our Alice, and no doubt she would have a very good life with him. He has said that he wouldn't take her to bed until she was of child-bearing age, not even perhaps until she is 18, but he wanted her to be committed to him as soon as possible.”

“I don't even want you to broach the subject to her, Simon. I refuse point blank for her to be a plural wife, and I despair of you as the loving father that I thought you were for even considering this,” said Mary.

“Mary, thee are going well beyond the normal behavior expected of a wife. Thee knows how much leniency I have given thee over the years – allowing thee to do what thee  likes with the shop, to socialise with gentiles, to even stop using Thee and Thou except in church. Do thee not know that in our religion, men are commissioned to make the decisions that the family lives by? Do thee not know that I could divorce thee for thy attitudes and behavior? In fact several of my friends have encouraged me to do just that.”

“Oh and have they encouraged you to take on a second wife as well – someone of Alice's age perhaps? Does that idea appeal to you, Simon?”

“Yes, they have, and I have said no, strongly and firmly, as I always have these past years whenever the subject was raised. It is thee I want for my wife. Only thee, but I would like to think we were more of a unit as we once were. Thee seem to question my every decision. It makes me wonder what else thee might do. I know how friendly thee are with the Gillogleys. The wretched man has caused such a problem just lately.”

“Whatever do you mean? What has he done?”

“Well one of his poor parishioners, a widow who works as a charwoman and has three small children, went and helped herself to two windows and a door in the property of John Reeves. And when the Sheriff went to get them back, James Gillogley supported her, sending the Sheriff away, and said that she had every right to keep them, as the properly had been left unattended and was apparently vacant for months previous to it being bought by John Reeves, whose is a wealthy railway agent, and not a Mormon, by the way. And then Gillogley had the nerve to write an article for the Liberal paper, The Dispatcher, reporting the situation, and calling Mr. Reeves, “A Mean Man,” in the article. So Reeves countered by suing Reverend Gillogley, with a libel suit for $50.”

“Will it go to court?”

“Yes, although I think it was scheduled once and then cancelled, and a new date for the trial has not yet been set. I don't know what the problem with that is.”

“Oh, poor Lucelia. I must go and see her soon to find out how they are getting on. They certainly cannot afford a fine like that.”

“He was flash enough with his money a few years ago. When they first arrived he bought land  lots and sold them at a huge profit and used the money to help pay for their church and school. Some would call that profiteering.”

Just then little Annie ran into the room, waving the little Bibles - one in each hand.

“Look what I found Mommy. Two little baby books. I found them in your hanky drawer. Can I have one?”

Simon was nearer, and he said, “Let me see the little books, Annie,” so she obediently handed them over to her father.

“Go and play with thy brothers and sisters, Annie. I need to talk to  Mommy alone.”

Simon knew exactly what they were. “Where did these come from, Mary? Don't even try to lie about it. These are King James version Bibles, and they certainly have no place in the home of a Latter Day Saint.”

“I won't lie, Simon. I knew that the truth would come out one day, and now it has. They were given to Annie and to Walker when they were baptized in the Good Shepherd Church, at my request.”

“I cannot believe what I am hearing. We discussed the possible baptism of Annie. I remember the occasion well. Thee wanted her to be done well before the age of eight, which I said was the appropriate time. I assumed that thee would follow my word on that. And instead, I now find that thee took it upon thyself, no doubt with the encouragement of the Gillogleys, to have the children baptised knowingly against my wishes, and into a church we don't belong to. Whatever possessed thee, woman?”

“What did I do that was so wrong? I was very unhappy, worried daily about whether the children might not ever be baptised, if their fate had been such as that of our little Nephi and Mary Isabelle.”

“Thee came to me, and I made the decision, and thee should have abided by it. That is the way of our church. The husband makes the decisions and the wife does not go against his will.”

“You make it sound like I am your slave – forced to do your will no matter what it is.”

“I cannot even think what the new President will say of thy actions, Mary. I very much think that the decision will be for thee to be severely reprimanded, unless thee repent thy actions, and even then, they might still want to excommunicate thee.”

“Why should they have to know, Simon? You don't have to tell them.”

“How could I live with myself – an elder who tells others how to live their lives, and offers them counselling or criticism when they break the rules, if I try to hide the fact that my own wife has broken the rules?”

“So what is it to be, Simon – Your wife or Your church? I expect that is the decision you will have to make. You say you love me and want to stay married to me, but I cannot believe that your church would allow you to be married to someone they excommunicated. You would be required to shun me, would you not?”

“I have no idea what will happen, but I do know that things will not be allowed to stay as they are. I will go now and discuss the situation with Franklin Richards. And I daresay any hope of Mr. Black wanting Alice as his wife will have gone out of the window as well. Thy sin will cast a very large stain over the whole family. Thank God that Isaac has already gone off to his missionary work. I can only hope that they will take pity on Eber, knowing that he was innocent of this entire thing.”

With that Simon slammed the door as he strode out into the night.

 

*****

Simon came home later that evening, and when he and Mary were alone, he told what the verdict would be regarding Mary's fate.

“President Richards said that the usual procedure would be for a disciplinary council to be held. A bishop and his two counsellors would invite thee into a private meeting that starts with prayer. Thee would then discuss the situation with the Bishop and thee would then be asked to show how thee has repented. Thee might be allowed to ask others to give testimony on thy behalf.

“Following that discussion, the bishop and his two counsellors meet privately to pray, deliberate, consider Church policies and doctrines and counsel together about the possible outcomes. They take into consideration many factors, including whether they feel thee has broken your marriage covenant; whether a position of responsibility or trust has been abused; the repetition or seriousness of the transgression; the degree of the individual’s understanding and evidence of repentance; and the interests of victims or family members. As the conclusion of this discussion, the bishop proposes a course of action, which must be ratified by his counsellors.

“At this point, thee would be invited back into the room, where the decision is presented and instructions would be given about the time frame, restrictions and conditions associated with the repentance process.

“The person seeking reconciliation is supported and encouraged in every way to meet the conditions of repentance and to look forward to a full restoration of his or her membership. It is a very positive offer for us Mary. And a way whereby the rest of the family might not be shunned and punished.”

“That is it, is it? Just a little talk with me saying I'm sorry and promise to do better in future?”

“Thee would probably be asked to refrain from taking the sacrament, or from participating in meetings, at least temporarily.”

“And if I do this, they will allow you to continue as an elder?”

“That is my understanding.”

“But Simon, I don't any longer wish to belong to this church which treats me so unkindly. You say they are making an effort to help me make amends. I say they are ignoring my feelings completely. I think I would like to resign from the church. How would that affect you?”

“I did ask Franklin about that too. It would stop thee from being forcibly ex-communicated, which would be what would happen if thee refuse the reconciliation process.”

“And if I do that, will you divorce me?”

"The church teaches members that the temple sealing is more important than anything else. Church policy requires that when a person resigns, their temple sealing is unilaterally cancelled (even if only one spouse resigns and the other stays active as I shall). However, we were not officially sealed in the temple – and were married before we joined the church. So we are not automatically divorced. They have left it up to me if I want to seek a civil divorce, if thee refuse the reconciliation process.”

“Do you want to divorce me?”

“No, certainly not, but if I don't, and don't shun thee, as I would be required to do, I would then be disobeying the rules of my church too.”

“Is there no way out of this, where we can stay married and you can stay in your church?”

“Well, as a last resort, Franklin told me that I might consider disfellowship. This would mean that I would still be a member of the church, still be allowed to attend meetings, although I would not be allowed to lead prayers, teach, take the sacrament, attend the temple or give sermons in public settings. And then if thee later showed repentance and were re-baptised, I could then be re-welcomed into the fullness of the church as well.”

“So all the pressure for your future in your religion lies with whether I am prepared to humble myself to the discipline of the church.”

“Yes, that is so. Whatever thee do from now on, will affect my future, and that of all our children in the church.”

“How long do I have to think about this? When do you want my decision?”

“I was hoping you wouldn't need time at all – that keeping our family together and in the church would be your obvious priority.”

“You were hoping that I would bow to your will as I have done countless times over the years.”

“Someone has to be the head of the family, and tradition has it that it is the husband. Most women don't consider that so difficult to allow, as you seem to.”

“ I will think and pray on the subject, and give you my answer soon,” said Mary.

“As you will,” said Simon, as they made their way frostily to their shared bedroom.

(to be continued)