Westons Go West 8 - The Good Shepherd

March 10, 1875

“Now that baby Annie is nearly nine months old, I would like to have her christened,” said Mary.

“Thee knows that the Mormon church does not believe in baptizing children until they are of an age of reason – at eight years old,” said Simon.

“I know how fragile life is, having lost two children under the age of eight, Simon, and I know that I would be much more at ease in my mind, if we had her baptized now.”

“Well, I will ask President Richards when I next see him. They might make an exception. And I know how determined he is that I should become endowed. We both could do it at the same time.”

“I do not wish to become endowed at this time,” said Mary. “I am not strong enough in my faith in the Latter Day Saints to make the required promises.”

“I do have the faith, Mary,” said Simon, “and I know that I wish to become more fully involved in the church. Soon Issac will be of an age when he will be going off on his two years' mission work – and he will be endowed before that. I feel it is very important that we should take that step first, to show him our total commitment to the cause.”

“I cannot dictate how thee lead thy life, Simon, and I know thee will not force me to do anything against my will. But please do ask President Richards about Annie being christened. It would so ease my mind to think she is protected in her road to heaven.”

The next evening, after the children were abed, Simon asked Mary to sit with him in the parlour.

“I made the opportunity to consult with President Richards, and first of all on the question of infant baptism, he refused. He said God would never deny any baby or child the right to Heaven when they are too young to have committed sins. We, unlike the church in England, do not believe in original sin.

“However, he did offer to provide endowment for our dead children – posthumously. Thee knows that the Saints feel that if anyone is endowed after their death, it will put them in heaven forever, along with all the promises made to us of our life after death. So we could then have the reassurance that Rachel, as well as Nephi and Mary Isabelle will be with us together in the celestial kingdom where we shall all live together forever. We could have it done at the same time as our endowments in the Temple. Do thee not ache to be fully committed to the church, as I do?”

“I don't like that idea – bringing the long ago dead into the fold. We had them all baptised. They are with God now. How do thee know that is what they want? Rachel chose not to come with us. She chose not to become a Mormon. Why should we now make a decision on her behalf to take away her free will?”

“Before she died, she would not have had the full knowledge. She cannot now do this for herself. She depends on us to do it for her. Do thee not want us all to be together forever in the celestial kingdom?”

“Of course I do, Simon. But if as thee says, Annie is too young to be baptized, why should the other children who died too early to sin, be put through this process?”

“I don't fully understand the reason myself, love, but I don't see how it could hurt, and for all we know, it might be important to do it. None of us truly knows what life after death will be like, and what is necessary and acceptable and what is not.”

“So saying that, does thee not think that denying baptism to Annie now, would also put a question in thy mind if she should die before she is eight as to whether enough had been done for her? And what of our other children. Will they all be baptised again except for her? What if they don't wish to be? And are you really sure that Isaac truly wants to be endowed? Have you discussed it with him?”

“As parents it is our duty to make decisions on behalf of our children. I think all but Annie and Alice should be baptized, and that it should be a family affair – with us getting our marriage sealed at the same time. Thee can later decide if thee wants to be endowed.”

“The control over our lives that this church takes frightens me, Simon. I don't like the way they say who we can be friends with – who we can sell and buy from – where we should send the children to school – all these sorts of decisions. I know how many wrong decisions they have made in the past, and how many lives have been lost because of it.”

“What have thee been reading, or hearing Love. What are you referring to? What bad decisions?”

“All these stories from the Meadow Mountain Massacres. All those innocent people were murdered by Mormons, masquerading as Indians to keep the blame from them. I know they are being brought to justice, that trials are being held, but even so, many of them have got off freely.”

“Thee knows that Brigham Young has decreed that justice will be done. He and our religion cannot be made responsible for the sinful actions of others, done decades ago, whether those involved were thinking they were acting in accordance with the Mormon beliefs or not. They committed sins. Brigham Young excommunicated several of them – those most at fault. And I am surprised that thee has the knowledge of all of these things.”

“I can read newspapers as well as thee can, husband.”

“But thee lack the experience and knowledge to interpret them, and to know what is true and what is false. I would rather thee didst not read them any more.”

“I will not be forbidden to read, and to think, and to make my own decisions, Simon. Thee are frightening me now. How long will it be before thee and they friends decree that I haven't the right to speak at all?”

“I will leave now, to give thee time to settle down, Mary. Thee are much overwrought. I will pray for thee. In the meantime, I will arrange with President Richards for my endowment ceremony to take place, and those posthumously of our three children left in England. I will bow to thy wishes and not have our marriage sealed or our other children baptised again at this time. But I will pray that thee will change thy mind, and let us be of one mind when it comes to religion.”

Mary was much distraught by this conversation with Simon, and when she took little Annie out for a walk in her baby buggy, she was in near tears when she met up with her new friend, Lucelia Gillogly, also pushing her baby, James, with four year old Helen trailing behind. Noticing that her friend was fighting back tears, Lucelia suggested they stop at a bench in the park for her to get control of herself.

“Dearest Mary,” said Lucelia, “whatever is the matter? Don't take on so.”

“I'm sorry,”squeezed out Mary. “I've had such a row with Simon, and I have more or less told him I don't want to be a Mormon anymore – and I don't know what's going to happen next. I wanted the baby baptised, but he said it wasn't appropriate at her age. He wants our other children baptized, but they already were baptized – in our Anglican church in England. That should be good enough. And he even wants to pretend that our dead children are choosing to become Mormons and wants to enrol them through an endowment ceremony – just to make the statistics of the numbers of Mormons in Heaven more startling, or something.”

“What a time you've had,” comforted Lucelia. “Would you like to come back to our house for a cup of tea?”

“We're not allowed to drink coffee or tea,” said Mary.

“Well, I'm sure you're allowed water – so I can offer you that, hot or cold,” said Lucelia.

So off they went pushing both buggies towards the newly opened Good Shepherd Episcopal Church, which had a small rectory attached for the vicar and his wife.

“Does thee live here in the church?” asked Mary, suddenly worried by the implications of her visitng so obvious a gentile.

“Yes, my husband is the resident missionary priest. We've been in Ogden since 1870, and for awhile we even lived in a boxcar. We  stayed with a Mormon Bishop's widow for a few months, but now we luckily have this wonderful new building. Please come in,” she added and they approached the small house. “How lucky the babies are both asleep,” said Lucelia. “We can leave them in their buggies in the yard, and have our drinks in peace.”

Her husband, Rev. James Gillogly, was writing his sermon at the table, and stood up as Mary came in. Lucelia introduced them, and he said he would take Helen out for a walk so they could have some privacy.

“Will you baptise my baby?” said Mary suddenly – surprising herself as much as anyone.

“Well, yes, I will, if you really wish it. I thought perhaps you were from the LDS section. I haven't seen you at our church,” he put in somewhat hesitantly.

“In England we were Anglicans – and went to St Margaret's Church in Leicester, and all my other children were baptised there. My husband became a Mormon, and I have tried to follow him in the way I talk and behave, but I am becoming very disillusioned with it all, and I do so miss my church from home,” she said, starting to cry once more.

“I know that Mormons tend not to baptize their babies at birth,” he said.

“Yes, and although I asked Simon and he checked with one of the elders from the church, they are refusing to do it for little Annie. But I am so worried she will die. Three of our children have now died – and at least I have the assurrance that they were baptized, so they can go to heaven. But Simon says in his religion they don't believe in original sin so don't baptize children until they are old enough to know the difference between right and wrong.

“And he wants us to have our dead babies be made honourary Mormons now too,” she added, “and it all seems so unnecessary and wrong. They became children of God when they were baptized in England, and that should be good enough.”

“I can see your dilemma, and I don't wish to get between a man and his wife, but I do think that you are capable of making the decision about your baby's Baptism without his approval or knowledge. And I will do it for you, right now, today, if you wish. Or do you want to think it over and discuss it with your husband?”

“There is no chance at all that he would agree, and he will stop me being friends with Lucelia if he knows about it. I don't want that to happen. I do so value her friendship.”

“Well, let's do it then. We can go into the church, and take the buggies inside. I'll get the white cloth, candles and oils and meet you by the font.”

So still shaking with the enormity of what she was doing, Mary pushed Annie, still sleeping into the beautiful new church – with the amazing blue stained glass windows (pictured above) offering such a contrast to the small rooms where she and Simon had gone for church services since they arrived. Helen ran to the children's section of the church to get her favourite book.

James reappeared in a few minutes, and going to the font at the back of the church, he asked Mary to hold Annie. He then asked her if she would do her best to see that Annie was brought up a Christian, and she said she would. He lit a candle, and gave it to his wife to hold.

“I need to ask you specific questions,” he said, and to each you answer, “I do,” if you do.

“Do you reject Satan and all his works and pomps,” he said.

“I do,” said Mary. There were other similar questions, and although they seemed ridiculous to be promising these things on behalf of a few months old baby, Mary was comforted by the familiar ceremony.

“Do you believe in the Christian church, and promise to do all you can to bring up Ann in the faith?”

“I will,” said Mary.

Then taking a small shell poured a minute amount of water over the corner of her head, saying, “I baptise thee, Ann, in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit,” and taking a small amount of oil, he made the cross on Annie's head,

“Amen,” said the others.

"I'll just get the form, and you can sign it, and we can go down as her godparents,” said James, as he rushed off to the vestry once more. When he came back, he asked Mary to fill in the details of name and address, and then sign the form on the bottom, which then he and his wife countersigned. Then he pulled a small book from his pocket.

“I always give our new babies a tiny children's bible” he said. “But I rather think you had better keep it hidden for safe keeping.”

“I don't know how to thank you enough,” said Mary. “I won't tell Simon now, but I have no doubt that sometime the situation will come out, and I want you to know that I am pleased and proud and so relieved to have Annie now officially a Christian.”

“God bless you, Mary,” said James, “and please feel free to come and see us whenever you feel the need. We also run a very good school here. Are you happy with where your children are being educated?”

“I really am so worried about how the children will be brainwashed by the Mormon religion, but as far as the school, they seem happy enough.”

“Our school is pleased to take Mormon children, or those from any denomination,” said Lucelia. “And we teach science to girls. How about that? And I teach music.”

“Oh, how I do wish that I could send them here. But one thing at a time. Thank you again for your kindness,” and Mary pushed Annie out of the church, as she was beginning to stir and would soon need a feed, so she needed to get her back home.