amber bain

amber bain

 

today

i wanted to pin up a poster

on my wall

 

girl with guitar

and a tattered jumper

 

feel that NME hope again

when pinning up the pages

was empowered action

 

there is a balance

somewhere

slow tipping

 

behind where i’d been looking

 

for the longest time

girl with guitar

and a tattered jumper

was always older than you

 

cloud dreams

 

putting up the poster

a speechless acceptance

of the unattainable

 

now

girl with guitar

and a tattered jumper

is younger by decades

 

fold it back in the magazine

as best you can

try not to think about it

 

decades

 

as i face the realisation today

i can’t place where they went

and that they are not unlimited

 

i am a universe of panic