Jobs...

 
They told me with my good looks, I was born for the runway...
I got hit by a 747 plane...
and now I don't even look the same...

They told me I could be a baggage handler...
So I became a councilor...
but you should be happy at work and this just made me sadder...

Then They told me to try being a disc jockey...
but the crowd just mocked me...
as I cut my arse and wound up last and in a&e...

I wrote my diaries trying to be a journalist...
But I'm conservative and kept it private...
I guess that's why nobody  knew about it...

I tried working for a.a...
but got caught drink driving towing a van away...
I lost my licence and now i have to go to meetings every five days...

Tree surgeon was the next vocation for me...
But there were complications getting the patients up the tree...
5 years wasted and an abandoned surgery...

Sold the place to a first time buyer...
Not phased by living a little bit higher...
They were just desperate to get their feet on the property ladder...

I even was a crash test dummie...
sat in Mother Care throwing pacifiers at tired out mummies...
To be fair after an 6 days, it just stopped being funny....

Then collected dust as a Hoover technician...
Causing a creeping depression feeling...
As it just sucked the life out of everything...

I needed a councilor after that...
So I went to the civic centre and complained about my trash...
It's why we pay our tax...

They offered me a job as a cleaner...
I got to work straight away, I couldn't have been keener...
Spat in a hanky and wiped the stain off her chin from earlier...

Another job chucked...
I tried kerb crawling to cheer me up...
But hit my head on a bus stop and left a terrible lump...

It was down hill from there, which was lucky, as I'd  become a roller skate tester...
But they simply refused to answer a single question...
The business went under after every one was a rejection...

Last hope was a light house way out of town...
But Its harder than you think and i just couldn't hold it down...
hopefully the wind will turn and bring it back around...