A Brief History of Rebellion (1996-2003)

Aged 14 and a bit:
Shout at your mum and slam door. You don't want a bed time anymore.
VICTORY.

Aged 14 and a half:
Refuse to go to Sunday School ever again. Lock yourself in bedroom.
VICTORY.

Aged 14 and three quarters:
Watch an eighteen rated movie (secretly) containing sex and violence.
VICTORY.

Aged 15:
Get drunk and vomit. Experience first hangover.
VICTORY and LOSS.

Aged 16 and a quarter:
Discover Dylan, The Clash, Bragg, P.E, Gil Scott Heron and KRS1.
VICTORY.

Aged 16 and a half.
Shout at mum. Wish you were dead. Why can't you go to Glastonbury?
LOSS.

Aged 17:
Read No Logo by Naomi Klein.
VICTORY.

Aged 17 and a few days:
Tell friends they are being oppressed by corporations.
VICTORY for you. LOSS for them.

Aged 17 and a half:
Refuse to learn how to drive. No pollution. Not in your name.
VICTORY for Stagecoach.

Aged 18:
No longer able to rebel through the consumption of alcohol.
LOSS.

Aged 18 and a bit:
Attend Mayday anti-capitalist protests. Bunk school.
VICTORY on both accounts.

Aged 18 and a half:
Do first adbust or 'subvertisement'.
VICTORY for you. LOSS for Tescos.

Aged 18 and four fifths:
Move to London for art school. Ability to participate in anti-cap movement increased.
VICTORY.

Aged 19:
UK and US invade Afghanistan. March a lot with new friends. Make bad protest art.
VICTORY for Osama.

Aged 20:
Fall in love with an American. You are dissenting against the dissenters.
VICTORY for love.

Aged 21 and a bit:
UK and US propose to invade Iraq. Attend biggest protest march in history.
VICTORY of numbers.

Aged 21 and a bit more:
UK and US invade Iraq.
LOSS.

Aged 21 and a half:
Give up. Leave disparate movement. Disillusionment. Confusion.
LOSS. Or VICTORY. Depending on your perspective.