My Crocheted Hat

I'm sitting here in me old green coat
Drinkin' me cuppa tea,
I know i'm a bit passed it, but i think
the waiter fancies me.
It must be me old crocheted hat,
that makes me look inviting.
I think if he takes me home,
we might get up to something exciting.
I asked him if he'd like a tipple,
a whisky or a gin.
He thanked me so politely,
with that special grin.
Oh dear! my tea is quite cold now,
my bun just a few crumbs,
I'd better go and face the truth,
it was all a lovely dream.
My flat is cold and empty, with
nobody else at home.
That's why i go for a cuppa tea.
But all is not lost, Fred lives next door
I know he really fancies me,
and he's 94
'Cos only the other, you see
he was knocking at my door.
He asked me out, he said he
wants some fun
So i went round to good old Fred's
and had a current bun.
Although my future's looking grim,
there's not a lot else for me to do.
I'll swallow my pride and stick with him,
until i'm 92.