I remember

I remember watching her eat a six pack of sticky snowballs with her back against the grey radiator. I remember seeing a boy peeing onto the base of our cherry tree. I remember the hot and musty smell of tomatoes in Grandpa’s greenhouse and the size of his hands; like shovels. I remember making a cake from lard. I remember tasting Pears soap on my fingers. I remember I found ten pounds in the park. I remember when my first period arrived in the middle of a tea-party attended by teddy bears. I remember later on that same day, being zipped up into a too small pink velour all-in-one suit. I remember her crunching her way through a box of Highlander sea-salt crisps. I remember her sending my sister out to the ice cream van for more crisps and my sister slid in her monster shaped slippers under the van. I remember being scared of ET and the fact he could be hiding under my bed, and if truth be told, even now as I lie in bed, I can imagine those long bony fingers coming up onto the duvet. I remember a boy chapped our door asking to see our pigeon. I remember the summer sun through my closed bedroom curtains. I remember a woman in a sweet shop said to me; ‘what are you having sonny?’ I remember roller blading down Venice beach. I remember when he felt my hips like he was comparing them to someone else’s.