valentine, for john

You are my soul brother;
my erstwhile distant lover,
the ties that bind us
swinging thin,& loose;
old rope, strong as wire...

Clumsy pupil: in all i learnt
i forgot how to hold your hand.
In the dream of here
your touch a song i had then:
before time and space -careless teachers -
made your fingers foreign
and my skin strange.

But in the gaps of now
you're my safety net, my brother,
my existential lover.
How could i not fall, or fail,
to gently touch your hand?
soft rain on dust, on sand.