A Painful Christmas

A Painful Christmas

“I need to talk with you .“ She said .
There was an uneasy tone in her voice .
He looked at her and she sat poker faced as he sat down at the dining table . the kids were all out and the house was quiet .

”Are you ok ? “ He asked and she answered .
“I don’t want to be with you anymore .“
Disbelief in what she had said was the instant reaction followed by an abyss where he disappeared . He was reaching out but she could not assist .
He grasped for her but she never wanted any further discussion as the kids came in one after the other from school . She took the children for a walk no doubt she would explain to them her plans .
As he watched his life walk away from him , tears fell down his face and the phone rang . He lifted the phone and in a daze he answered the caller .
On the other end of the line was his employer who offered a reduction in his salary . His eyes gazed into nowhere and responded .

“Sure .“
As if nothing mattered anymore .
When his wife and kids returned they all ran into their bedrooms .
The loud sounds of tearful laments echoed through the entire house and their heartfelt crying changed nothing .
The night was long and dark .
He tried to talk her around day after day but she refused to reconsider her decision .
For eighteen years they had been together and had seen and done so many things together that this was just so inconceivably cruel .
As the days passed he became more invisible in the marital family home .
The front door now seemed the only option . He could not eat , he could not sleep .
In the stores around town Christmas decorations started to appear in all the windows . They had lost all their glow and no matter how he tried it was hard to say goodbye to his wife and children .
Now it was about two weeks to Christmas when the boss said to him ,
“I’m cutting back cost’s of running this company . I’m reconsidering your position with us .“

He handed him a broom and a bag of rags and said .
“Ok here’s the deal if you’re interested . You can start on Monday on the factory floor . Your new cleaners job pays about twelve dollars an hour .“
He nodded his head in agreement and took the broom and rags .
Friday was a hard night when he arrived back to the marital home because he was told by his youngest daughter her Mum said if he would not levae she would and the kids were coming with her .
Faced with no other option he put a few clothes into his car and kissed them all goodbye than left the only thing that life had gave him .
It was hard driving with tears in his eyes . He had no idea of where he was going . As darkness fell he drove into an industrial estate and behind a factory complex there was a car par . That’s were he parked the car .
Sleep would not come and he wrestled with his thoughts all night .
Dawn came and found him alone and cold then he was reminded of what and where he was . Monday was only two days a way and his new job as cleaner was a situation he was going to be forced to endure .
Monday and the madness of the work place soon hit him hard . The crazy foreman ordered him around like a slave and now and then he was told exactly what he thought of him .
From one day to another things got worse until eventually he reacted and told the foreman where to go . It was now five days to Christmas when he was terminated .

Without a word of thanks for eight years of loyal service to the company he was handed a small pay packet which had to see him through the next number of weeks until the holidays were over .
Christmas had just been sent into receivership as far as he was concerned .
Every year of his marriage he had always got a bonus and the children and his wife always had gifts in appreciation of his love fro them .
He stood outside the factory thinking of self harm .
It was his darkest hour and life had handed him a invitation to exit ASAP .

On the eleventh hour of the last Friday before Christmas he got down on his knees and cried .

“Dear God to help me in my difficulty .I have no job , nowhere to go , my wife and kids are gone and nobody loves me anymore . “
A quiet voice spoke to him from around the corner .
“But I do John . “

“What ?
He replied .
“I love you more than you ever realise John.”

“Who are you “
“I am who I am . Now just know I love you and everything will be ok .”
When Christmas came John had managed to stay alive living in his car .
His wife had tried to contact him a few times but he had no credit on his mobile phone and so could not answer . The hurt that he felt was deep and he had no words that he wanted to share with her at this point in time .
It was boxing day and he had heard news on the car radio about some big Christmas lottery winner who had not yet claimed his prize .
Just at that moment John remembered about that lottery ticket he had purchased after losing his job . He searched for the ticket frantically and sure enough behind the photos of his children in his worn out wallet was that winning ticket . He could hardly believe his luck . Now he knew God was working for him .

With then news of his luck he had to make a decision .
Would he tell his wife who no longer loved him of his fortune or would he just disappear into a new life with the millions he had won .
He rang his wife reverse charge from a public phone . Not knowing if she would accept the call he waited until she said .

“Hello .“
“Can I come home ..“

“No , John I don’t want you here .”

He asked again
“Are we going to be separated forever . Is there any chance of us getting back together again ?”

“I can’t answer that .”
She stated . At least she didn’t say it was really finished and there was no way they could ever be together again .So he relented for a while his decision to let her go completely .

“How are you ?”
He asked .

“Ok . How are you ?”
“I’m actually doing pretty good .”
There was a kind of silence on the liner as if she was shocked by his response . He knew by the break in communication that she was a little rattled so he began to laugh . Each giggle made him wince in pain as sleeping in the back a car had damaged his ribs and lower back .

“What’s so funny ”
She asked .

He tried to explain he had pins a needles in his feet and pointed to different parts of his feet and legs as if she were standing in front of him . Then she said she had things to do and had to go . So she hung up the phone .
With a gesture of care he placed the phone back on its cradle and left the public phone box .
Within a few weeks he was on TV .
The big news item of the day .
Homeless man wins major prize in Christmas Lottery .
It was now a new year and John brought the smile to many faces as he took gifts to some of the less fortunate people in society .
His wife had been trying constantly to ring him on his mobile phone but John had it turned off .
John needed some time out and ordered a number of interviews to be set up between him and his wife .
He had bought her a small home and organized a trust fund for his children to receive when they were 21 . He now had a good solicitor to help him with the legal issues of marriage separation . One afternoon as John stood waiting for a taxi outside his solicitors office a cab pulled . John got in and this large man dressed in old rags sat there behind the wheel .
“I’ve been told to tell you how much you are loved .”
Thedriver said .

“What ?”
John replied .
“Someone very special needs you to understand that everything will work out ok . Just trust and continue to do the right thing .”
The taxi puled up at Johns new flat .

“It’s a free ride John.”
The driver said and then drove off at speed .
John remembered another time as a young lad when he wrote letters to God and told him his dreams He remembered how in his imagination he filed all those letters in an out tray .
Suddenly a truck turned the corner out of control . It was a postal delivery truck and there was nothing anyone could have done to have changed the direction and the outcome of that moment .
John was killed instantly .
If in his last moments any one could have been there they would have heard a brief conversation that went .

“Hello my beloved John . Its time to bring you home .”
An immediate response was ,
“Now I know how much you really love me God . “
This year had started no different to most people except for a few unfortunates who had been given gifts by a wealthy stranger . A woman a her children who now had a brand new home and a factory complex that had been bought out through mediation between solicitors .
The factory John had bought before his death was to be handed over to his sons to do with as they wished . They were to be assisted by a carefully chosen group of people in the business world .

Although John was now gone he was remembered fondly by many people and the legacy he left continues to remind others each Christmas to care more .

The End

By Paul McCann