The hidden painting chapter 2

I would usually stay with my mom until the night staff come on duty. I just sit by her side and try to keep her as comfortable as possible. When I see a touch of discomfort reach her face, I top up her morphine by pressing the button that’s tied onto the railing of her bed. I know when it enters her bloodstream as her face relaxes almost instantaneously. I have no issue sitting at her bedside reading my book whilst she sleeps. After all, she has mere days left on this earth and I want to be there for as many hours of that as possible! Between that now and not wanting to go home to that dirtbag Mike.

The nurses on the ward are great! They have no problem with me staying long after visiting hours are over because they know that I don’t get in the way of them doing what they need to do.

Mom is so lucky to be in a lovely room all to herself, with her very own wet room. I’ve heard through the grapevine that rooms like this are like gold dust in hospitals around the country. I’m just glad she doesn’t have to listen to anyone screaming in pain or distress because I know that would stress her out completely!

Me and mom are kindred spirits in so far as we both have a relatively unhealthy bank balance. Equally the first bill we both pay each month is always health insurance! ‘Where would you be without it?’ she is always harping on! I know I’d have to sell a kidney, or worse, in order to pay what the insurance company has paid for her care to date! Between chemo and radiation, and the surgery…not to mention all of the inpatient stays! The bills would be coming out of my ears!

Just as I’m at a pinnacle point in my book where the heroine finds out that he loved her all along mom begins to tussle with her oxygen mask. I put my book down and try to help her, not knowing whether she wants it on or off. I know that it can be tight at times, making it uncomfortable on her face. She looks into my eyes as I help her remove it and she says ‘leave the bastard already!’ without preamble. I have to smile as she is literally thinking of my wellbeing until the very end.

‘Ah,’ I say, ‘you’re awake!’ and tuck my book back in my handbag. I leave the house in such a hurry these days that I keep my bag and coat in the car. Especially my bag as I found Mike rifling through it last week. When I confronted him, he denied everything, but he had been caught red handed!

As mom and I converse, I notice her breathing becoming shallower with each word. She’s a bit groggy from the morphine as well, but better that than her being in pain. She beckons me closer to her. I oblige. ‘Promise me that you’ll go looking for the painting!’ she pleads.

‘I promise mom!’ I reply still uncertain as to whether any of the story of the missing painting is true. If nothing else, it gives me a fabulous opportunity to bond with my new car and get away from that other conniving bastard for a few days!

Once nine o’clock hits the night nurse comes in. ‘Good evening, Mrs Spencer!’ she says all bubbly donning her navy-blue scrubs with the hospital logo stitched onto the left pocket.

‘Hello nurse!’ I smile and kiss my mom gently on the forehead with tears in my eyes. ‘I’d better go mom!’ I say. She grabs hold of my hand and mumbles, ‘bye love,’ under the oxygen mask. Just as I reach the door, she removes it to add, ‘and remember what I told you!’ putting her finger to her nose indicating the information to be top secret!

I touch my own nose and then blow her a kiss. As I begin to walk away, the same nurse pulls me aside, ‘I wouldn’t go home if I were you!’ she says, ‘I think we’re talking hours here, not days!’

I begin to choke on my breath. The room starts spinning. The nurse brings a chair to me and I sit there with my head between my legs, gasping for air, for a good ten minutes. This is news you can never prepare yourself for! It’s something that would knock the stuffing out of anyone! I try to wipe the tears that are streaming down my face with the sleeve of my top when the same nurse goes down on her honkers beside me.

‘Are you ok? Can I get you anything?’ she asks whilst handing me a box of tissues. The staff here would be used to family members getting this kind of news, but until you experience it yourself, you just don’t know how it’s going to hit you.

I think back to earlier today, before Mike verbally attacked me, back to the hot chocolate and the way the smell was nostalgic. ‘You wouldn’t happen to have any hot chocolate, would you?’ I ask, wiping my eyes knowing I’m chancing my arm, expecting her to say no!

‘Theres some in the staff room!’ she says to my surprise. ‘Are you ok to walk? It’s just at the end of the corridor!’ I nod and she winks at me, inviting me to follow her.

She swipes her staff key card opening the last room on the left. The room has a dark countertop with a microwave and a kettle on it going down one side, the fridge in the corner. On the other side are two small tables with six chairs. ‘There’s milk in the fridge, the microwave is on the counter and so is the cocoa powder. Just make sure the door closes tightly when you leave!’

‘Thank you!’ I shout after her as she leaves and goes about doing her job.

I root in the cupboard over the microwave and find a lovely pair of mugs, one with Winnie the Pooh on it, the other with Eeyore. I fill both up mugs three quarters full of milk and zap them in the microwave until they’re plenty hot before adding two heaped tablespoons of cocoa powder in each one. I stir them well and as I’m about to leave the staff room, a health care assistant enters and looks me up and down.

‘My mother is dying!’ I say, ‘and the nurse looking after her let me in to make her some hot chocolate!’ He puts his hands up, ‘I’ve seen nothing!’ and holds the door open for me as I carefully walk the sumptuous hot beverage down the length of the ward.

When I reach moms room, I gently wrap at the door before opening it. I see that they are changing her so I wait outside and take a sup of my contraband. The nurse, who I thankfully overhear being called Hayley, comes out of the room and smiles at me, nodding towards the mugs. ‘She’s ready for you now if you want to go in!’ she says as another nurse exits the room holding a yellow hazardous waste bag in her hand.

I turn my head around the door and mom beams up at me. The nurses had put a fresh gown on her and propped her up in the bed. They must have brushed her hair as well because she genuinely looks like a new woman!

‘Wow,’ I say, ‘look at you!’

She swats me away with her hand. ‘They put this in my nose,’ she touches the nasal canula Hayley had thoughtfully fitter her with.

‘That’s great mom!’ I smile at her and hold up the two mugs that are in my hands.

‘No!’ she smiles, ‘it’s never!’

I nod, ‘it is!’

‘But how did you…?’

‘…Hayley let me into the staff room!’ I say and place the Winnie the Pooh mug on the bedside locker and, after taking a sup to test the temperature, I hold the Eeyore mug up to her mouth. She tries to hold it herself, but she is just too weak!

‘That is like the taste of heaven!’ she says laboriously, looking up at me with gratitude. ‘You are the best daughter anyone could ever ask for!’ she says gasping for air, tears beginning to form in her eyes.

I put the oxygen mask on her face again and sit on the side of her bed and take her hand, ‘don’t upset yourself mom! Just enjoy the here and now!’

I wipe away both our tears and see her face contort as though she is in agony! I’m surprised at that because they should have given her the strong stuff already. I look up at the bag of saline that is dripping into my mom’s arm and notice its almost empty. I investigate further by leaning over moms legs to inspect the machine that is delivering these fluids, and notice that there is seven minutes left on the bag. Happy with the explanation, my focus turns back to mom.

‘Would you like more?’ I ask her holding up the Eeyore mug. When she nods her head yes, I take the mask off her once again and do the same as the last time, hold the mug to her lips. When she’s finished, she says, ‘ahhh that’s the business!’

I take a leaf out of her book and when I taste mine, I notice it tastes better here than in Mike’s! The company could have kicked the flavour up a notch.

I hear a gentle knock on the door and turn to see Hayley return with a new bag of saline. She’s closely followed by another nurse who hands me a pillow and a blanket and together they make sure the morphine is at the correct dosage for this time of the day. As they are leaving the room I say ‘thank you!’ with genuine surprise over the pillow and blanket. I look over at mom to show her how they aren’t only looking after her, but me as well! As I turn my head in her direction, I notice that she is fast asleep with a grin on her face. I smile, happy in the knowledge that she’s in no pain.

I can see in her that she is heading for the light purely by her breathing, so I climb onto her bed and put my head on her chest. I give the morphine a boost and she somehow finds the strength to place a hand on my head. Tears seep out as I listen to her breathe until she can breathe no more. I look up at her face, her eyes are closed yet she hasn’t lost her smile.

‘I love you mom!’ I tell her and press the nurses call bell to alert them that she has passed.

 

It was an intimate funeral to say the least. Mike refused to come, saying he had a prior engagement with a few of his buddy’s to play golf. Being honest, I’m glad he wasn’t there because no doubt he would have ruined the day for me anyway! Mom had a limited circle of friends, who all came to pay their respects.

‘Right!’ I say clapping my hands together, as we finish in the crematorium, ‘let’s all go and have a toast to Sadie!’

I see a smile wash over everyone’s face. I give a lift to moms good friend Mary, to the bar the group frequented. I insist on buying the first round! Once we pull a couple of tables together, and everyone is seated, I raise my glass of diet coke and say, ‘to Sadie, may your smile continue as you look down on us! I love you mom!’

‘To Sadie!’ the group says in unison, Mary handing me a tissue which I graciously accept.

As the drinks begin to flow, so do the stories. I sit back and listen to a group of people who were very good to my mother talk fondly of her. It was enlightening if nothing else hearing the antics she got up to. I’d believe every one of them! Mom was no wallflower, that’s for sure!

As the group decide to disperse, I offer my services as a taxi driver. Three of moms friends take me up on my offer, Mary being one of them. With four scotches in her, Mary is a bit unsteady on the legs so I link her arm in mine and help her into the car which is literally outside the door of the small pub. Charlie and Annabelle follow and get into the back of the car.

‘You’re a great girl!’ Mary says as we embark on the journey to her house, ‘always so good to Sadie!’ she says.

‘Thanks,’ I smile back, ‘I tried to be as good to her as she was to me!’

We arrive at Charlie’s house first, then Annabelle’s, and finally Mary’s. I help Mary out of the car and get her inside, turning on lights as I go. I put her sitting in a very nice recliner and put the TV on for her. I’m certain she will be asleep in a couple of minutes so I leave her be, my mind at ease knowing she has a son still living with her.  

 

When mom’s lease on her apartment was up two months ago, she had already been told that she was terminally ill. She decided not to renew the lease, before she knew I was getting evicted, and decided to store all of her earthly belongings in a storage unit. She kept the bare minimum in the motel where she stayed for three weeks before being admitted into hospital for palliative care. I had offered for her to stay with me over the bookshop, but she just wasn’t able to navigate the stairs. I even offered to get a stairlift in, but no, she wanted to do her own thing. No one guessed she would live as long as she did. I was secretly hoping she had an elixir of life, but that was just me being selfish! She is pain free now, and is above looking down on me…I hope!

After dropping Mary and the others home, I looked at my watch and it was only seven o’clock. I dodn’t particularly want to go back to Mikes, so I go to the storage unit mom had chosen to leave her belongings in.

As I open the garage door of the unit, I see boxes going from floor to ceiling on both of the side walls, all with their labels facing out, the furniture piled high in the middle of the room.

When mom had given me the keys a few weeks ago she pulled me close and said, ‘when I pass, promise me you will go through absolutely every box in there!’

‘I promise!’ I replied.

I was intrigued when she added, ‘you’ll be pleasantly surprised at what you will find in some of them!’

This happens to be the first opportunity I have gotten to open the door since a couple of professional movers packed all of her stuff in here. I’m looking forward to seeing what she meant about being surprised!

I clear the kitchen table in the middle of the unit as best I can, and sit on one of the six chairs ready to go down memory lane! I decide to start on the left-hand side of the room and, with the aid of another kitchen chair, I pull down the topmost boxes off the pile and place them next to the kitchen table. When I have six boxes lined up, I begin to look through them carefully, as promised. As I dig into my third box, labelled tea towels, I find a wad of cash wrapped up in one of them. I get excited when I see this because it’s something I could really do with and if it’s in one box, the chances are there’s more!

I laboriously search through each box carefully, putting them back from where I got them as I go. After the last box is searched, I look at the kitchen table. I’m faced with no less than five scrap books that she made over the years, and a grand total of $5,500 in cash. With tears running down my cheeks, I’m faced with a dilemma. Do I spend the money on an apartment, or do I go in search of the illusive painting, using the money to fund my trip? The sheer magnitude of the decision is overwhelming! I think to what mom would want me to do, and remember promising that I would go in search of the painting, taking the decision out of my hands!

‘It looks like I’m going on an adventure!’ I say to myself as I gather the money and the scrapbooks and place them in an empty box. Once satisfied the unit is safe and secure, I walk to my car, carrying the box in front of me. After I place the box in the boot and secure my seatbelt, I can’t help but scream, ‘yahoo!’ and do my happy dance.