The Knee
By monodemo
- 215 reads
I’m heavy in every way!
So heavy, my knee plays
Havoc from my weight,
I’m left in an awful state!
No cartilage left,
Weight part of the theft!
Just bone on bone
Left, I’ve become
Reliant on my ruby red crutches,
Stil I walk, it crunches!
A new knee is what I need!
The surgeon pays no heed,
For dangerous the surgery,
Appertaining to anaesthesiology.
Psych meds help not the cause,
Removing them, dangerous because,
Reliant I am to stop depression,
Psychosis is well worth a mention!
So here I sit, afraid to move,
Never will it improve,
Until I lose all the weight
Then a new one he’ll create.
Free from pain I will be,
A new lease on life, set me free,
Heavyness a curse I must bear,
Happen it will not I fear!
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Comments
This is a really moving piece
This is a really moving piece. However, in my opinion, the rhyme scheme seems a little forced in places, and some of the lines remind me of Yoda-speak. They could possibly do with rewording to help it flow better. But your poem's still great, and you don't have to take too much heed of this, I just want to read more of your stuff!
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