PrimeMorgikk1029

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I have 14 stories published in 0 collections on the site.
My stories have been read 1809 times and one story has been cherrypicked.
2 of my 24 comments have been voted Great Feedback with a total of 2 votes

PrimeMorgikk1029's picture

Hi!

I am a budding author and have only just begun writing stories. I'm still largely inexperienced and will accept any help or criticism you can offer me! Not too harsh though, please! 

My stories

Ribbons

Ribbons are everywhere. Ribbons in a loop support charity, and ribbons fly high for pride of belief Ribbons leaden with gold hang around necks...

Killing Time

I killed time today. It doubled over twice, clockwork heart thudding as it fell from its face As it hit the ground, I thought I heard it squelch. But...

A Sea of Tears and Flame

The blood clouded into the grey water. Like dark tendrils around the coral, entwined snakes spiralled, creating a web of holes. Pitiful moanings...

2 of my comments have received 2 Great Feedback votes

1 Vote

This is a really moving piece

Posted on Wed, 19 Jun 2024

This is a really moving piece. However, in my opinion, the rhyme scheme seems a little forced in places, and some of the lines remind me of Yoda-speak. They could possibly do with rewording to help it flow better. But your poem's still great, and...

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Posted in The Knee

1 Vote

The sentence fragments create

Posted on Wed, 24 Feb 2021

The sentence fragments create a powerful sense of hopelessness.

This is great!

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Posted in desert rain