GENTLE CURRENTS

By moonphish

Sun, 16 Nov 2014
  • 807 reads
7 comments
 

 

 
i will swim your gentle currents
take me back the way you choose
i swam stubbornly upstream
till i had nothing left to lose
.
it will take no innovation
i just drift without a care
and my only destination
is to roam till i am there
.
i dance while you meander
like a feather in the breeze
all a-sparkle with translucence
just as pretty as you please
.
i will never dwell in doldrums
you will pull me in your sway
with your body so attentive
while your mind's involved with play
.
there'll be rippling waves of laughter
that will fill the world with glee
and the love you placed within my heart
will live eternally
.
i will swim your gentle currents
with the stars above to guide
i refuse to meet the future
till you're right here by my side
 
 
Certificate U
Poem

Comments

Submitted by memphis on

These words just takes my breath away . Because your (pen) words has that sway. Metaphysical filled with seasonal grace.

William E Alexander

Submitted by memphis on

These words just takes my breath away . Because your (pen) words has that sway. Metaphysical filled with seasonal grace.

William E Alexander

Submitted by moonphish on

thanks memphis for your kind words..i am so pleased you enjoyed 

Submitted by Shannan on

This reminds me of Romeo wafting around writing poetry for Rosaline before he met Juliet and actually genuinely decided to act and didn't want to just 'meander' any more ... ... ...  and love is a verb I've heard...

 

Submitted by moonphish on

thanks shannan...beautiful comment....glad you enjoyed

Submitted by Shannan on

My apologies Moonphish, no offence to you, but as a reader with her own interpretation I created an incorrect perception with my comment. I didn't enjoy the poem. It has actually phenomenally annoyed me as I feel it advocates & purports the apathy of a large group of learners I teach who believe they should get everything for doing nothing, have rights but refuse responsibility & want everything without earning it or doing anything to deserve it :-( I can't stand the waft through life mentality when there is so much to do & every second is so precious... anyway ... I guess I support Rosaline in not choosing life with a meanderer ... but thats that's just me.

 

Submitted by moonphish on

understood