Oh, Apple Tree

Daryl (a colleague) and I made an interesting discovery today while doing little else. A discovery that will have implications for the whole of peoplekind - or those of the persuasion, as you might say - to whit that God is, in fact, an apple tree. Oh yes. Omnipotent, obviously. Variety unknown but, at this stage, variety is a minor detail to be argued about as the factions form up.

We share this knowledge as it wouldn't do to appear shocked when stepping onto the great Salter scales of the firmament and being confronted with it. Might cause offence - you know, not good form on a first meeting. Don't even whisper it to St. Peter. He/it hears everything of course, such as "Do you think He would mind if I had an apple?". Sounds familiar.

Further revelations expected and may be shared, for a small cost to cover administration obviously, in the near future. Any time, in fact. Alternatively attend your local orchard or cider maker and await the great rising of the sap.