Is there any greater love

By Parson Thru

Mon, 25 Aug 2014
  • 1040 reads
5 comments
 

Is there any greater love
than a mother’s for her child?

A commotion on the platform
Piercing shriek
A woman’s voice raised in answer

Hair neat and shoulder-length
Greying
Respectable, you’d say

She wore a simple coat
Light in colour
Satchel bag across her shoulder

Gentle and intelligent
I read her face
She held his wrists up high

A tableau of love's tragedy
Her eyes desperately
searched to catch his gaze

He bolted once again
Animal-like
a surge of adolescent strength

She fought him
with her arms
Steady voice of calm command

He reared and whinnied
nostrils flared
A young rebellious colt

Eyes, rolling sideways
meeting hers – pleading
in the language that they shared

He lunged again
her satchel twisting awkwardly
She spoke his name

His arms lowered
turning to the train he issued one more cry
I watched her tension ease

The years have etched
upon her face
an outline of her soul

Lord, is there any greater love
than this woman’s for her child?

Certificate U
Poem
Parson Thruses Dairy
Miscellaneous

Comments

Submitted by Geoff Smith on

It's a lovely narrative image. It feels a bit out of time though, and the language is a little unstable in that the comparative imagery uses intense vocabulary that is a little dissonnant with the stoic reserve of the main image.

Thanks for reading. I am grateful for your time.

Submitted by Parson Thru on

I'm learning from you - little by little.  It might take me some time to figure all of that out. Wonderful stuff, really.  In terms of gut-feel (where I live), this never really felt right all the time I was writing it, which is a shame because it's meant to be a monument to this woman and her devotion to her son.  This all actually happened on a station platform.  I really wish I had the skill and didn't just drop lucky sometimes.  I might try to paint her again one day.  The image will certainly stay with me.

Thank you, Jasper.

Parson Thru

Submitted by Parson Thru on

BTW, you hit the nail on the head with stoic reserve.

Parson Thru

Submitted by Philip Sidney on

I like that you've pushed this quiet heroine into the limelight.  

Submitted by Parson Thru on

She probably wouldn’t welcome it. Thanks Philip.

Parson Thru