8 Oct 05: 'Brian Blessed'

9.30am

Brian Blessed...

He has the same initials as Big Brother. And he's going to be in our local Videodrome shop today, 12-4. Who is he? The main birdman in Flash Gordon. And I saw him interviewed on The Heaven and Earth Show recently - talking about... I dunno, spiritual things, I suppose. He is a childhood hero! I want to run up to him and say...

'Go on, say that line!'

'What line?'

'In Flash Gordon!'

' "Ahh well ' - in that deep, booming baritone that I know so well - ' "who wants to live forever? '

Brilliant!

That's if he knows which line I'm talking about...

And why would he?

Flash Gordon was ages ago. Nineteen-eighty-something. Brian Blessed's done loads of things since then. Like... erm... you know... that thing with... wassisname. What has he done since Flash Gordon? Nothing memorable. Nothing more memorable than...

Ahh well, who wants to live forever?

Classic line!

Followed by Brian May's screeching guitar and the descent of the birdmen through those pinky-purple clouds...

Actually, funny thing... what happened to Flash Gordon himself? I mean the man who played him, not the Quarterback of the New York Jets... who have probably never actually had a Quarterback called Flash Gordon... or Flash anything... .possibly a Mr. Gordon, though... although probably not...

5.00pm

I didn't go and see Brian Blessed in the end.

Couldn't be arsed.

I mean, he's not really the main birdman in Flash Gordon...