Impediments to reaching the treasure

By Rhiannonw

Fri, 22 Sep 2017
  • 1454 reads
4 comments
 

blackberries’ defences

Through heavy rain (the autumn tints still show),
but skies ahead are clearing as we go
to find a favourite blackberry picking spot;
it’s now too late this year to find a lot,
but search and persevere a box to fill
so winter puds receive a tasty thrill.

––––––––––––

Thorny tentacles entrap
feet or legs to tangle, trip,
or grasp that boot-lace, snake-like grip
– balance shaken, mustn’t slip;
and deep, soft grass and moss obscure
dips and holes, uneven floor,
gorse and snag-thorns scrape and tear
clothes and fingers stretched to where
little juicy treasure perch
just beyond precarious reach.

Certificate U
Poem
Nature
Nature
Autobiography

Comments

Submitted by Di_Hard on

Yes! Particularly like "grasp that bootlace, snake-like grip" Also "Where" being at the end of the line. Those last 3 lines are like tiptoe

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Thanks. There always seem to be such lovely ones just out of reach, and some that one can just reach - tiptoe and stretched arm, but don't tip the box! I'm not sure if the thorns undid the lace and then held it, or got hold of a lace that had undone - I'm not good at tying double knots! Rhiannon

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

Hi Rhiannon,

you know you've pointed out so well how difficult it can be to find the best blackberries, especially in those lines:

Thorny tentacles entrap

feet or legs to tangle, trap,

or grasp that boot-lace, snake-like grip

- balance shaken, mustn't slip;

Great poem for the time of the year with some perfect descriptions.

Jenny.

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Thank you, Jenny. It was good to be out in the fresh air and views for a few minutes, and to return with some late blackberries, but those tentacles were entangling! Rhiannon