Sorry?

By Rhiannonw

Tue, 19 Dec 2023
  • 534 reads
8 comments
 

"I’m sorry I’m in a mess,                                    "I'm sorry for the mess                                                  
stress, distress:                                                 the stress, distress
goaled, failed                                                     I've caused my wife.
the planned                                                        Can I turn round my life?
theft of the grand;                                             Will the God I offend
broke,                                                                  be willing to help me mend
what a stroke                                                     and do as I intend?
of bad luck                                                         Clean up the mess
to be caught                                                       and dirtyness
by one who would not                                       inside;
be bought;                                                           I'll not try to hide it
                                                                              with jolliness —
no joke                                                                  Oh, for a clear conscience 
what a pity … "                                                      usefulness
                                                                               peace, happiness …  "  

[IP: sorry]             

 

 

Certificate U
Poem
Christian, Biblical
Philosophy
Inspiration Point (work that responds to our weekly writing cue)

Comments

Submitted by Tom Brown on

Ok! Good! How did you manage the typesetting I can't do that maybe with tags? You can read it down a file only realised later. Clever.

All the best Rhiannon! Tom

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Thank you, but, well, it isn't very tidy, Tom. I wanted two parallel poems to be compared. My  husband thought he could have got me to do it in columns before putting on and it might have worked. I couldn't see how to do columns on the site. So I just did it by hand, and tried to get the second one fairly straight. Once I saved it (unpublished) I could see it looked very wiggley, so I just adjusted the lines as much as I could so it would look a bit better. And then I thought it would do, and I had better no spend any more time on it. As long as it is readable and reasonably tidy!! Rhiannon

 

Submitted by marandina on

I like the duality of the underlying message. Both parties apologising acknowledging that none of us are perfect. We should all say sorry more often. Nicely done, Rhiannon. Paul

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Thanks. Yes, good that both have regrets, but even better if it isn't just self-centred and leads to better action! And, yes, saying 'sorry' isn't easy. A children's book said, 'You need to push the words out!' Rhiannon

 

 

Submitted by Nolan on

Personally I don't like the word "sorry" it's cheap it's empty. I would rather, "apologise", or "won't do it again". Sorry is when you dropped your cigarette on your best friend's wife's new sofa ;-) and "i will buy you a new one", or when you stepped on her cat's tail by accident.

Cheers! Nolan &

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

It's easy for a word to become empty. But it's still hard to say for many at many times. Changing to a different expression can make clear that more is meant than vocalising a word I suppose. At all times it's worth thinking about whether we're genuinely sorry! Thank you for your input! Rhiannon

 

Submitted by Nolan on

"please excuse", that could work too.

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

As long as we are sorry and wanting to be excused, forgiven! Rhiannon