Swallowed up?

Cherry

By Rhiannonw

Wed, 17 May 2017
  • 4983 reads
12 comments
 

The ball of fire sinks into the blue
(or is it green, or grey,
blue-green today?)
bite by bite it drops out of sight –
will the ocean boil, and froth,
sun quenched?
Dark clouds, dark sea,
no boundary clear –
which makes it appear
the water has taken our light:
we wait through the night
for the colours to shine –
the myriad hues
of pinks and blues,
the patterns, the greens
of fields, and petals,
of faces, and wonderful scenes,
as the rays rise again in the dawn.

[Poetry monthly: Into the blue]

 

Certificate U
Poetry Monthly
Miscellaneous
Surreal
Humour

Comments

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Any feedback welcome as to whether this quirky little poem works. I didn’t know whether to put it under ‘humour’ or ‘surreal’. The actual photo was taken from a studio flat in which we were staying on the north Pembrokeshire coast and showed the sun sinking into a sea and cloudy sky that had merged and gone rather grey – and looked darker in the photo as it was taken into the sun. I know next to nothing about photoshopping, but pressed something and the sea and clouds took on this interesting electric blue effect.

 

Submitted by jeand on

Hi Rhiannon

I really like this. Sunset is my favourite time of the day, but you made a good case for sunrise too.

Jean

Jean Day

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Oh, thank you, Jean. Yes, beautiful sunsets are  so lovely, but after the 'quiet' of night it's good to see so much again! This was such an unusual sight, to me, and my thoughts went to a child's fable I read once about consternation amongst the animals of the jungle I think when a solar eclipse occurred. Rhiannon

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

It always amazes me how the sky can fill you with such wonder, especially when the sun goes down. So many beautiful colours transcend, then as the sun rises at dawn we feel the energy of a new day coming. You've captured so much of that in this poem.

Great work for Poetry monthly Rhiannon.

Jenny.

 

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Thank you, Jenny. Glad you liked it. Thank you for telling me! Rhiannon

 

Submitted by Jane Hyphen on

Enjoyed this, the idea of the water swallowing up the sun is surreal but that's sometimes how it looks. Makes you wonder where our ancestors thought the sun was going. 

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Thanks, Jane. That was how it looked that night, with the dark sky merging into the sea, and no clear skyline. The regularity of the sunset/sunrise, like the length of the seasons, and movement of the stars, must have stimulated consideration of the movements of sun and earth. Rhiannon

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Thanks for the cherries. Rhiannon

 

Submitted by Ed Crane on

 

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Thanks, Ed! Rhiannon

 

Submitted by luigi_pagano on

Well done on meeting the challenge with this vibrant and colourful poem, Rhiannon, worthy of all the plaudits, not forgetting the cherries.

Best, Luigi x

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Thanks, Luigi. I was glad when viewing this unusual scene to realise it might fit into this challenge. Rhiannon