ATOMIC

I love dancing, that feeling of euphoria when you let all your inhibitions go, music makes me feel invisible. As I'm dancing I feel the rhythmic hypnotic beat of the drum and bass track reverberating around the room. I’ve been coming to this bar for ages, I’m almost part of the furniture. The DJ plays knows how to spin a good set and keep the crowd entranced. The only reason I come here so often is because of him, he's my reason for existing. I wait in anticipation every time for him to walk in and notice me, and desire me the way I desire him. I remember the  first time I laid eyes on him I was so taken back by how drop dead gorgeous he is, I was immediately smitten. The way he dresses, his piercing blue eyes and enigmatic smile would capture anybody’s heart. Every time I catch a glance of him my heart skips a beat, I get butterflies in my stomach. Of course real life doesn't always work out like that. Unfortunately, I have to resort to other measures to attract his attention, actions that would be frowned upon by many. However needs must and some men need a nudge in the right direction. I like to put all my energy into my projects, I’m determined  enough to always get what I want. 

Tonight seems to be my lucky night, as right on cue in you walk looking as gorgeous as ever.  Life suddenly seems to be going in slow motion with every step you take, as you head towards the bar. I stop dancing and just stand there transfixed by you, I can’t take my eyes off you which only intensifies my desire. The bar staff take a shine to your magnetic charm, like moths to a flame. My God can you be any more perfect? I notice you push one of  your friends money away as she offers to pay for the drinks. So not only are you handsome but generous as well, I knew I had chosen well. I’ve no idea who the bitch standing next to you is, but I’ll soon be rid of her along with the entourage surrounding you. My God they’re like a pack of hyenas it's pitiful to watch. How the hell am I going to attract your attention with them around?  I’m suddenly pulled out of my reverie by some idiot who pushes past me, causing me to fall flat on my arse. Instead of going down my mouth, my vodka spills all over my dress, I must look an absolute mess. Someone rushes over to help me, but as I stand up I notice you walking past me and you look directly at me. Finally at long last you have noticed me, granted it wasn’t how I had anticipated our first  meeting to go but to hell with it I didn’t care. My patience has finally paid off, you have finally acknowledged my existence. One way or another I will make you want me, the way I want you. As I eventually gain my composure, I noticed someone in the far corner staring at me. From a distance he looks vaguely familiar but I couldn't be sure in the dim light. He stands with his arms folded with a cold hard grimace. As I draw closer my entire body freezes, “holy shit” it can’t be.  It's him, I can’t believe he's found me. 

I contemplate making a quick exit, but he starts to make his way towards me, I knew there and then that I was in deep shit. It must have been at least five years since I last saw him, and he still looked  as handsome as ever. A cold shiver runs down my spine as he gives me a look of disdain and contempt, and quite rightly so as I did almost ruin his life. Granted, it wasn't one of the brightest things I've ever done in my life, but I had to get his attention somehow. It wasn't my fault that the feelings weren't reciprocated, so I made him my project. I like having projects, they keep me focused. It's astonishing what you can find out about someone from the internet and just how close you can get to someone without even speaking to them. It was such a bloody shame that his stupid wife got in the way and ruined it all. I genuinely believed that we could have been happy together, I just needed more time.  Of course the judge ruled in his favour and I was given a suspended sentence for harassment, and ordered not to go within ten feet of him or his family. As I said, it wasn’t one of my best moves stalking him. As he approaches me the contempt in his eyes does make me think he wants to cause me serious physical harm. I try my best to hide among the crowd, but it's futile as he heads straight for me. Suddenly I feel a tight grip around my arm as someone ushers me out through a side exit. I can't believe my luck, I am absolutely stunned. Staring right back at me with his piercing blue eyes and handsome smile is my new project. My hero, I knew I’d get him one way or another.

My dream  is short lived as come back to reality, and realise my Mr perfect hasn't come to my rescue after all. His grip around my neck is getting tighter, I can barely breathe. There’s commotion and chaos around me, my lasting memory before I pass out is the hate in his eyes. Evidently, today isn't my lucky day after all.