Sushi Bar Haiku Set
By seannelson
Wed, 08 Sep 2010
- 1053 reads
6 comments
the sweet blonde waitress
geisha body, sparkly eyes
free salty soy beans
California rolls
I order, with some sweet drink:
my waitresses' fave
the clang of chefs' knives
or samurais in battle;
all life is struggle
feasting on the rolls
bamboo plants recall Thailand;
Basho eats nearby
order tuna rolls
Kiriban rides down my throat;
more dragon than deer
bill and a good tip
take all my cash; that's okay
my trip to Japan
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Comments
this is a pretty cool little
this is a pretty cool little collection of poems. I like the start best: sweet blonde waitress/geisha body, sparkly eyes/free salty soy beans. and the "all life is a struggle" verse - feels like it could end there, if the second verse connected the two in some way.
just a poem monger
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"But I'm a poet and I write
"But I'm a poet and I write poems how I want to. I'm not really looking for major advice."
I think that was minor advice, and most poets who have their work read always say thanks.
As for me, many small hands
issuing from a waterfall
means silence
mothered me. ~~ Li Young Lee
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