Autumn Colours

Cherry

By skinner_jennifer

Mon, 31 Oct 2016
  • 4231 reads
17 comments
 

With rapid

speed in

Nature's

Merry dance,

 

russet colored

swirls of leaves

chase through

Autumnal bluster –

 

as shadows cast

from street lights

in darkest

dead of night.

 

In doorway slumbers

abandoned alone

he like this ditched

cardboard home,

 

mislaid his once

contented life

hankering for

a loved dead wife,

 

now loudly

drinkers swagger

out into cold

forbidding air,

 

nightclubs begin

filtering – too

inebriated for

seeing or hearing,

 

All lost – misplaced,

simply vanishing

like Autumn leaves

they disappear.

Certificate 12
Poem
Poems
Nature
Inspiration Point (work that responds to our weekly writing cue)

Comments

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Very thoughtful, Jenny. Rhiannon

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

Thanks Rhiannon,

decided to stay with the IP and title in the end.

Jenny.

 

Submitted by seashore on

Nice one Jenny - I liked it very much, though I.don't think you need the exclamation mark in 3rd line 4th stanza.  Just a suggestion...

Submitted by Ed Crane on

because one day it could be you or me.

Thoughtful piece, well earned cherries.

 

Submitted by Linda Wigzell Cress on

Beautifully told Jenny, the imagery in the final stanza is brilliant.

Linda

Submitted by Ray Schaufeld on

Jenny this is good and unexpected. I was anticipating a straightforward Nature poem as I know you often write well about Nature and then when you introduce the fallen man ...

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

Hi Coral,

I'm glad you liked this poem and I agree with you about the exclamation mark so have taken it out.

Many thanks for commenting and sharing your thoughts.

Jenny.

 

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

Thank you for your kind words Ed and for reading. 

I'm always grateful for feedback.

Jenny.

 

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

Hi Linda,

It's so satisfying to know you were able to grasp what I was trying to convey in that last stanza and I appreciate you letting me know.

Many thanks for reading and leaving a comment, it means a lot.

Jenny.

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

Hi Elsie,

It's great when you can absorb my thoughts. I do love writing about nature, but I could see the relationship between the leaves being swept along as with human life, sometimes I feel we have no control and are swept along too.

Anyway, many thanks for sharing your thoughts and for reading.

Jenny.

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

So many thanks for the cherries Editors, always love to see them.

Jenny. smiley

 

Submitted by jeand on

Hi Jenny

I thought it was a good poem. I can't write poetry at all, so marvel at how people can take a few words and put them together in a meaningful way.

Jean

Jean Day

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

Hi there Jean,

I bet you could write poetry, it's just a case of looking at life in a different way. I imagined the drunks falling out of nightclubs and staggering just like the leaves being blown around. Then the man in the doorway, loosing his wife and his way, left to rot like those fallen leaves.

You should have a go, try it out and I bet you'll surprise yourself.

Anyway many thanks for reading and commenting.  Glad you enjoyed this poem.

Jenny. smiley

 

 

Submitted by luigi_pagano on

I knew that you are an accomplished prose writer, Jenny, but to discover your poetic flair was a revelation.

Luigi x

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

Many thanks for your kind words Luigi.

I do wish I was an accomplished writer, it's only because of abc tales that my writing's improved. It's been a case of reading others work, taking advice and learning from them, that has helped me get to the place I'm at right now.

Long may it continue.

I do appreciate your feedback Luigi and your time reading.

Thank you again.

Jenny. xx

 

 

 

 

 

Submitted by hudsonmoon on

So sad, Jenny. Love this side of your talents.

Rich

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

Thank you so much for reading and the lovely comment Rich.

Jenny. x