Flashpoint

By snakebite

Thu, 08 May 2014
  • 441 reads
3 comments
 

Marching to the sound

of the same old bloody song

the world is at the tipping point

where the hell did we go wrong?

 

Marching like a zombie

as they drag you to your knees

the devils that we're fighting for 

are the only ones to please.

 

Feel the metal's thunder

hear its mighty roar

see armegeddon's blinding light

that throws you to the floor.

 

Caught up in the blastwave

glimpse the crimson tide

Satan laughing while we burn

no God to take our side.

 

Still the world keeps turning

hungry for our end

the beast upon the battlements

with nothing to defend.

 

No tales of death and glory

ringing in our ears

abomination aftershock

has dried up all our tears.

 

So now we've reached the flashpoint

no winners of this war

the life we thought was ours to live

won't happen any more.

Certificate 15
Poem

Comments

Submitted by scratch on

Wow!  A rhyming poem that manages to be relentlessly bleak, that's not easy to pull off.  Well done.

The penultimate stanza is a little stumble in terms of metre and rhythm.  Apostrophising 'abomination' (abomination's) would go someway to fixing it and would allow for the personification as well which might serve to add further strength and focus.  Excellent though.

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

This could almost be words to heavy metal music.  You have all the terror and fear in there.

A powerful read.

Jenny.

 

 

Submitted by blighters rock on

This is an inner song by my next door neighbour. Scratch and Jennifer! You were spot on. He's an old rock and roller, just like moi-meme. He's new to poetry as a form of song and he says thanks for your comments