Break The Child: Chapter Thirty-One: The Meeting

Chapter Thirty.

            I was meeting Danny at one and waited by the door so that I could get out fast. I saw him coming up the path. You couldn’t miss him; the three, helium filled foil balloons gave him away. One said Happy Birthday, the second To My Girlfriend and the third Fourteen Today.  When my Dad saw them, he’d tease me for the rest of my life. He kept doing the whole protective father thing, ‘If he hurts my little girl I’m going to break both of his legs with your mother’s rolling pin.’ But he said it in a Chicago-town, gangster voice so I knew he was joking. I asked him if he’d be wearing Mum’s pinny when he did it and he told me that I was getting too smart in the mouth as I got older.

            I had to get Danny away before my dad came out and saw him, but Dad embarrassing me was the least of my problems. I mean, its one thing Danny knowing that I’ve got a mother with dementia but it’s another thing altogether having her thrust on you when you’ve only been going out with someone for three days. Some people worry about their parent’s getting the baby photos out; I’m worried that my mum is going to be the baby.

            I headed him off by the gate. ‘Come on, quick, let’s get out of here.’ Grabbing his arm, we started walking down the street.

            Two doors further on he stopped. ‘Hey, slow down. Well hello to you, too. Do I get to at least wish you a happy birthday before you wisk me away?’

            I wanted to keep walking and get out of sight before we said anything. I wanted to be able to concentrate on just Danny and him saying, ‘Happy birthday’ to me and not have to worry about getting dragged back into the house. It would be so embarrassing in front of my dad, what with the balloons and everything. But Danny wasn’t moving. He was just looking at me. ‘Wow, look at you. You look amazing. So, you’re a rock chic now, are you? Does that mean you’re going to dye your hair black and get loads of tattoos and a Harley? Please say yes to getting a Harley.’

I screwed up my nose as if thinking about his question. ‘Well, definitely not this week.’

            He carried on staring at me, ‘How about just the tattoos then?’ I punched him on the arm. You look great but don’t change anything, you’re perfect. Happy birthday, Kate,’ and then he kissed me. That was my fist ever birthday kiss from a boy. I wanted to remember it always. But I also wanted to get away. I broke the kiss off and pulled him away from the fence. ‘Hey, what’s the hurry? I haven’t given you your presents yet.’

            ‘We’ve got to move before my Dad sees us and drags us back to the house.’

            ‘But he knows about me, right?’

            ‘Yes, I told you he does.’

            He stopped again and held me at arms length to look at me. He was thinking and took a moment before he spoke.

‘Are you ashamed of me, Kate?’

            ‘No, of course not, it’s just awkward, that’s all.’ We’d still only walked a few steps from my gate. I had to change the subject. I looked down at the big bag with Birthday Girl written on the side.

            ‘So, what’s in the bag?’

            ‘What bag?’

            ‘That bag.’

            ‘Do I have a bag?’ he looked down and gasped, ‘I do. I have a bag. Oh no, I must have picked it up on the bus by mistake.’

            ‘You didn’t come on the bus?’

            ‘I didn’t?’

            I shook my head.

            ‘Well in that case. I suppose it must be for you. But you’re not getting it yet.’

            ‘Aw, why not?’

            Because I want it to be special and didn’t plan on you opening your presents while we’re walking down the street.’

            ‘Kate? Katie, wait up.’ It was Dad. He was standing in the street in his socks, I dropped Danny’s hand fast and moved away from him. My dad had seen me holding a boy’s hand, it was so embarrassing. I groaned just another few steps and we’d have been around the corner and out of sight. There was nothing for it, we had to turn back.

            ‘Hey Dad,’

            He looked hurt. ‘Were you going to slope off and not say anything?’

            ‘I did. I shouted “Bye,” as I left.’

            ‘Hello Mister Bell, I’m Danny.’ Danny was bright red, even his ears were glowing, but he put his hand out to my dad as though he was a proper, grown up man. They shook hands and dad looked surprised but kind of impressed too.

            ‘Hello Danny, I’ve heard a lot about you—but not nearly enough, so come on in and let me grill you. I’ve been looking forward to this for fourteen years. But I’d be happy to wait another few before my baby got a boyfriend. We need to talk.’ He had a huge grin on his face, and I could see that he was enjoying himself a whole lot. We went into the house and Dad led Danny straight into the lounge, not the living room and not the kitchen where we nearly always sit. I thought Dad was being all formal just to take the Mick. I could hear Mum, Aunty Linda and Aunty Helen. Then it went quiet and they all came in. Dad had told Danny to sit down and we were sitting together on the sofa. His hand was really close to mine, but I didn’t dare touch him. It was really hash-tag awkward.

            Aunty Linda had a tray with cups of coffee, sugar, cutlery and side plates on it and Aunty Helen was carrying a birthday cake with one lit candle and a sparkler. Mum was randomly carrying a cauliflower; I have no idea what that was all about. And then all the grown-ups started singing Happy Birthday really loud. I could see out of the corner of my eye that Danny’s lips were moving a bit, but hardly any sound came out. It was one of the cringiest moments ever and I thought that if God wanted to kill me, right then, it wouldn’t be so bad.

            When they got to the Dear Katie bit of Happy Birthday, Mum just, kind of, tailed off because she’d forgotten whose birthday it was. I felt tears coming into my eyes and Danny noticed it too.

He glanced at me. It was as if his eyes were saying, ‘I really want to tell you that it’s going to be okay, but I can’t look at you because your Dad’s looking at me and this is really awkward.’ And then he looked away again, but his hand was close to mine on the sofa and he moved his little finger so that it was just touching the side of my hand.

            My Dad’s head moved to the side, like a cat with a spider, tracking the movement of Danny’s finger. He looked proper comical, and then he wasn’t like a cat, he was a budgerigar.

‘Oh, for God’s sake, lad. Hold her hand if you’re going to, stop pussy footing around.’ And me and Danny both went even redder. He didn’t look at me at all, but his hand moved across and took mine.

            ‘See, they’re like twins, their faces are exactly the same colour red. Have you been out in the sun too long, lad? What do you think, Linda, do you think they look like twins?’ My dad thinks he’s really funny.

            But there was something about that. It’s the saddest, saddest thing in the world. Dad always brought Mum into his stupid jokes, but he can’t now and has to make Aunty Linda his joke assistant. If he said to Mum what do you think, Annie? She’d probably think about it with that look she has and then say, ‘Well I think the pie will be cooked now, dear?’

            ‘Oh, leave them alone, Steve,’ said Aunty Helen. Linda had put my cake on the table in front of me. ‘Come on then, blow your candle out and make a wish.’ I did, but I think I wasted my wish because I wished that my Mum would get better and come back to me, but I knew that was never going to happen. There should be proper rules about making birthday wishes. You should only be allowed to wish for things that are possible.

Danny squeezed my hand.