A Ton Of Muck

You've got to eat a ton of muck
before you die, Uncle George would say
and said it just before he croaked
having presumably eaten his allotment.

He meant it either as wise counsel
generally speaking, or an apologia
for his cavalier cleanliness.
We were never really sure enough

To eat with relish the plate of chips
slapped down before us by mucky bear paws.
It'll not kill you
the best we could hope for.

These days health and safety would be down
like a ton of bricks,
and not a real ton, obviously.
It's just a saying, after all.