Just a grammatical thing 4

The period then made its dull appearance: "I'm the period and i am not BORING! All sentences end with a period, even those that are incomplete thoughts. They end with three periods like this... I am the most important grammatical device and he pretends to be me at times. He says he is a grammatical chameleon, but does he know anything about being a part of grammar? I don't think so. I want to state that the PEROID already exists and we do not need an impersonator being ME again."
The interviewer then asked me why there was a need for a grammatical chameleon if all these grammatical devices existed already. i did not know how to answer him. why is there such diversity in nature? i didn't know.
"I really think i am important JUST INCASE," i heard myself say.
The interviewer then said, "Just in case the grammatical device were to disappear?"
"YES." I smiled. i turned into a parenthesis and then threw myself sideways.
"How does a just in case become the word best?" he then asked.
and i answered, "just in case. if a quarterback gets wounded in football, they throw in the just in case quarterback, don't they?"
"But the best has never been wounded."

i started to hate the word best. what was the point of it. it made everyone else feel bad. best, what did it mean? could more than one person be the best at something. i was best at changing into different grammatical signs. wasn't that worth something.

Then the parethesis appeared. she was crying: "Every time I enter a sentence, he is there, like a stalker, trying to get there before me. I feel like my identity has been raped. In the worst case this (( happens. Do i look like a curved road ahead sign? What is he anyway that he can changes sexes. He's disgusting!"

The interviewer looked at me again, observing my behavior. i just turned into a huge exclamation mark. I was about to clobber the parenthesis when the interviewer stopped me. i was arrested for assaulting a parenthesis with an exclamation mark (bat).

i was in jail along with the $ sign and the % sign. they were so frequently manipulated by crooks in Wall Street that they had their own cellphones and offices. i just sat in the corning, pitying myself.