Rape iv

For the woman, I think it is the "disrespect" of rape that is most humiliating. Rape eliminates. Rape reduces the victim to "0." Rape is punishment, humiliation, and rape is the ultimate "taking" without consent. In colleges and high school, rape is especially hurtful if it is related to what I refer to as the "black book." Some athletes and other seducers write the names of women they want to have sex with in black books. At the same time, there are some women who also have "black books" of sex for men they want to have sex with.

Why has sex become sex such a vehicle of power and attraction? Sex works. Sex is more acceptable than violence. Sex establishes a pecking order of status. Those who have sex with more attractive or wealthy women are given a higher status. Sex also becomes a form of fetishism, an obsession with the vulva, penis or breast as an object in itself, divorced from other parts. Sex is more immediate and Dionysian than other sports. Sex brings together in a mystical manner.

When I was in high school in the South, two students had sex and then came out flush faced afterward to a crowd of people who were waiting for them at a party. I was very disgusted and felt sick inside. Anyway, the people who have the highest sexual status are often viewed as the King and Queen of the society. 

So women are conflicted as to the nature of their desire. They want respectability in one sense but they can be viewed as a whore if the sports star just has sex with the woman and then ditches her. They could become the girlfriend of the sports star in which case they gain some status, but it is a status that depends on the shifting needs and moods of the athlete. Some women are just used to being treated badly so they may not even know what a rape is.

Obviously, if the athlete has a black book and he rapes with intent because he cannot seduce, then it is rape. But I think the woman really wants to know the why of the "rape." Some of this can get rather complex with the sex games of athletes, and they are not all that different from the sex games in literature or in adult society. In a few cases, it may be another woman who dared him to "seduce." This does not exculpate him from the crime. 

The seduction games of athletes is one thing I never really understood. I think, at a basic level, it is a very materialistic. It's what he has in terms of property, possessions, friends, etc. that dominates the conversations. I don't even understand the charm of these conversations, but this is the athlete's way of asserting his sense of power and entitlement. Athletes also often have this idea that foreign countries owe Americans a whole bunch of money so that foreign women should be more compliant sexually to American men. Most of the money that America gives to foreign countries goes to the rich, and there is no relation between the money given to foreign countries and the availability of foreign women unless the athlete considers foreign women to be prostitutes.