Dark and Silence

They didn’t want to die. They didn’t want to. They didn’t plan to. She was thirty two. He was five. The other She was three. The older She was a little distracted by the radio as she went round the corner but it was his fault. The lorry smashed them to bits. Five years ago now. He couldn’t bear it any longer. But before he ended it he wanted to relive his life. All the books, the films, on videotape! The music on vinyl and cassettes! He worked out it would take at least a year. He started on January 15th. January is a good month to start killing yourself. Every time he finished a book he threw it in the bin. In April he read Brideshead Revisited and gasped at its beauty. He listened to Radiohead. July was Kaszuo Ishiguro or whatever his name is, listening to the Clash. In October he binge watched Tarantino then got drunk listening to The Jam. He was right. It did take a year. January 20th. Last book. Last film. Last cd. 1984, Cabaret, Lou Reed. He was sat in his favourite chair from Laura Ashley. Of course it was dark in January. Very large whisky, with ice, even though Scots call you a prick for doing it. Dark and silence. The last scene in Cabaret is Joel Grey saying, well, he doesn’t say anything. The last words of 1984 are “Big Brother had won at last”. I don’t know what Lou’s last words were but when he'd seen him in Leamington he was nearly dead anyway.