Are you Insane, Bored and Unattractive?

MWM looking for an unattractive, unintelligent and insane woman to chat with maybe less.

Are you repulsive, hideous, manic, irrational and psychotic?

Mean, nasty, vicious, dysfunctional, brain damaged drunks with one eyebrow go to the front of the line!

Age isn't important, probably somewhere in the 19 to 89.7 range. Skin: Yes, please have it, preferably white and full of opened, cystic blackheads oozing with pus and filled with more pulsating Blowfly eggs than a mutilated cow.

If the wrinkles on your neck and your sphincter match, we're twins! If the chunky discharge from your vaginitis tastes like I'm licking a hairy, necrotic pork roll, let's make gravy!

Please be height and weight proportional, meaning your hat size, blouse size, shoe size, waist line and IQ are all the same: 48! Do you have one of those enormous, freakish, elephantine heads with no discernible neck and three chins covered with hairy moles?

Does your face look like it was used to punch out bulldozer blades? I mean your head makes Sponge Bob look like a pin head, a head so huge that you can take a shower and never get your feet wet.

Does a picture of your head require the Hubble Telescope? Does your head frequently get caught in high voltage power lines or does it just look like it? Does walking down the street require a float permit and guy-wires?

Are you Bipolar, meaning your head is so large it can be seen from the North and South poles at the same time? Have you ever been mistaken for a downed weather balloon? Has your head ever been responsible for a total lunar eclipse?

If your Muumuu has a giant "Winnebago" logo on it, we're a match! If you have huge jowls, a dewlap and jagged, green teeth with more film than a rectal thermometer, you are hot! Do your buck teeth look like they've been used to eat bamboo all day? Does you breath smell like a fisting mitten?

Do you have propeller marks on your back from swimming in the Florida Everglades? Does the thought of you eating a Burrito Supreme cause blood to shoot out of Al Gore's eyes? Does releasing your "gas bloat" fill a room with airborne intestinal pen worms?

If you look like the offspring of Carrot Top and the Michelin Man and you can't take a picture of your feet without your tits getting in the way, you're special! Please be huge, BBBBW, thick, chubby, plump, a little extra, more cushin for the pushin, curvy, chunky, corpulent, flabby, plus sized, rotund, pudgy, potbellied or whatever you're calling it these days.

Does your body fat indicator read "Lamp Oil?" If your folds have stale pop tart crumbs and pork rinds in them, let's eat! If your only mode of transportation is large, earth moving equipment made by Caterpillar you might be big enough. If your ears are so big they cause a wind advisory when you step outside, let's go sailing! Does your makeup kit contain a Hoof Pick and Tail Comb?

If you like sucking rancid food particles from between your buck teeth, share! If you've got enough male hormones to sprout four inch nose hairs and grow pork-chop side-burns take a Cialis and hit me up!

If you've got a bumper crop of dingle berries and you've got more skid marks than a long haul trucker's underwear, you are a 10! If you can smuggle a gallon of Häagen-Dazs Chocolate Chip ice cream out of a nudist colony, you've got talent!

I am around Kennesaw; please don't even be in Buford, Bakersfield or East Bumble Fuck.