When Tears turn to Dust

I thought this was a good poem Jenny. True and poignant. This is true of so many problems that go from generation to generation; like the people cutting down the rain forests because there's no other work or the people on council estates who join criminal gangs because of lack of opportunity/adequate role models- "forced by predestined quandary... their ancestral family all they new" I think that you use the imagery of not being able to see the sun as a good metaphor for the way that these men are trapped in their situation by poverty and lack of education. "so he would drill till siren sounded once more, we pit ponies never knowing the bright daylight, but for them at the end of a working day, up top few hours of blue sky, before darkness once more". I come from a big ex-coal mining area. I have mixed feelings about it. On one hand it was bad for the environment but on the other hand it was a massive part of our culture. Best gone but not forgotten, I think. JoHn

Hi there, Jenny. I really enjoyed this. Two tiny typos:- Stanza 3, should be 'too few to look upon' and in the fifth stanza, should be 'all they knew'. I spent a lot of time up in Durham when I was a child. My father was stationed near there in the war and he made lifetime friends with many mining families. The warmth of those people was overwhelming. There is so much truth in your poem, Jenny and it brought it all back to me. Much enjoyed. Tina

Great poem and title Jenny It is clear enough it was a pony not a man, though I wasn't sure of sing out of long hours meant K

You have captured an atmosphere very well here Jenny- I got a good picture of the hard life as a miner. We have no coal mines in Denmark. Well done ;)Pia

new skinner_jennifer Hi! jenny,very well written. Absolutely true, everthing you have written. Look at the awful explosions recently. Risked their lives. The men would sing majority men known, Welsh have good voices. They worked and lived their lives, always at risk. Maybe shoul go under, Biography! Title drew me in at first to read.Of course their bodies from top, to toe and faces, be covered in coal mining merals and coal dust. A relation worked coal place. When I first went to work at 14 I worked coal co;an Aunt lived opposite coal dust never came of when place dusted.Mum's grandfather worked coal. Dustman used to lag, it heavy on their shoulders covered tip into coal cellars. Bad for the lungs too. Have a good day.So pits been terrible. People work in any job, don't get the light needed if working inside either. Hope week-ends fine, for light. Well done on writing this. I answered thanks comment. Lost mine damn computer, no glasses on maybe. Men had to hump on their backs, faces covered black from dust of coal and tip it in coal cellars. Not big built. But office and all had go for x rays, chest for safety all of us! Title made me think was loss of love on at first. I think differently whoops! julie xx

Hi, Jenny. I thought you made it very clear that it was from the pit pony's perspective because of the line: "we pit ponies never knowing the bright daylight," but I also thought you were drawing parallels between the lives of the ponies and the miners. I think that this poem works on more than one level. JoHn - "Ex amore victoria". ("From love comes victory".)

That part is a lovely idea Jenny probably singing about blue sky! K

Really strong and very real, if you see what I mean. A good read Jenny. Trying to catch up with my reading!X

I liked this poem very much. I am reminded of those lines from Reading Goal "I never saw a man who looked with such a wistful eye upon that little tent of blue we prisoners call the sky." Working underground, whether man or beast, divorces us from the wonder of daylight - and must be very like being in prison I think;)

Now that's how to tell a story in poetry. I will watch your writing with interest.