Homer...and all that Jazz
By Silver Spun Sand
Mon, 27 Feb 2012
- 2553 reads
19 comments
I lay with her
in her room,
lost my way
in the forests
of her hair,
and she found me,
again. Shrouded
in the haze
of too many cigarettes,
we remade the world.
Drew funny faces
on the misted-up window,
and a new-fledged flock
of starlings rose
from the hedge;
a long,
black scarf
they snaked
across
the face
of a daytime
moon.
And, as Telemachus
did before me,
buttoned up my jeans,
and said goodbye,
to my ‘Child
of the morning’,
my ‘Rosy-fingered Dawn’;
the sky, aflame.
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Comments
I simply love the image of
Permalink Submitted by twoflowers on
I simply love the image of the long black scarf snaked across the daytime moon. You really know how to evoke a moment ever so clearly. :)
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This is stunning Tina. I
This is stunning Tina. I really enjoyed, so many beautiful images in this :-)
Beeme xx
k.
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I also thought the image of
I also thought the image of the starlings flying across the daytime moon was all too beautiful- you are so talented Tina- I wish I could write half as good as you.
I'm a sucker for love stories
;)Pia
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Beautiful poem, love the
Beautiful poem, love the overall imagry and rythym. Then when you deliver the line "Rosey-finger of Dawn" I was taken aback! Well done! :)
- Chinobus -
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Good morning Tina, this
Permalink Submitted by skinner_jennifer on
Good morning Tina,
this seemed like such a personal poem, so touching...
a secret between two people who cared for each other,
that shared a tenderness that could not be understood
by anyone else.
I too saw that film Love Story and cried buckets
too.
A beautiful tender poem, thankyou for sharing.
Jenny.
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Wow, Tina. Really enjoyed
Wow, Tina. Really enjoyed this. Fantastic words that made lots of pictures in my mind. Great stuff.
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Enjoyed as well. Shrouded
Permalink Submitted by hudsonmoon on
Enjoyed as well.
Shrouded in the haze of too many cigarettes
We remade the world
Rich
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Love the mythical imagery of
Permalink Submitted by MistakenMagic on
Love the mythical imagery of the final stanza, Tina - takes me back to my first year of uni, which seems so very long ago ;-)
"Shrouded
in the haze
of too many cigarettes,
we remade the world."
- love these lines! Well done on the cherry!
Magic xxx
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There is some very strong
There is some very strong imagery here. I loved the second stanza; the image of two people playing on the glass in pale room was simply crystal clear... all of life is in this piece.
Good job Tina x
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