Vortices

By Parson Thru

Wed, 29 Aug 2012
  • 1267 reads
3 comments
 

I step off the train seeing twisters
Vortices drifting over the hill

I walk through a buddleia barrage
Airburst of fireworks frozen in flight

I dream of a garden of lovers
Ghosts of contentment waiting for death

I wake in a world of attrition
Days are like petals falling to earth

I step off the train seeing twisters
Vortices drifting over the hill

I walk through a buddleia barrage
Airburst of fireworks frozen in flight

I dream of a garden of lovers
Ghosts of contentment waiting for death

I step off the train seeing twisters
Vortices drifting over the hill

I walk through a buddleia barrage
Airburst of fireworks frozen in flight

I step off the train seeing twisters
Vortices drifting over the hill

I step off the train seeing twisters

And death

Certificate U
Poem
Parson Thru II
Nature

Comments

Submitted by The Walrus on
I love the repetition, parson Thru. It's almost like a mantra, very musical. For me the last line came as a bit of a shock although you already used the word 'death' twice, but it seems it was in a slightly different context. Strong stuff.

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
I agree with the Walrus...mantra-like sums it up well. And I too was rather 'jolted' at the end, which is no bad thing;-) Tina

 

Submitted by Parson Thru on
Thanks Walrus and Tina. It really needs 100 feet of white space after the last line. Or infinite nothing. I'd like to have the chant scroll over and over before the end. That would be nice. :-) Thanks both.

Parson Thru