WEDDING CUSTOMS

so why do brides wear veils ?, you ask
i'm gonna tell ya why
the jealous spinsters in the church
could cast an evil eye

and why do they throw grains of rice ?
i will not skip a beat
to boost up one's fertility
they used to toss out wheat

and why do they bedeck the cars
with strings of noisy cans ?
they used to creep 'neath windows
raising hell to spoil their plans

and why the ring on finger, third ?
i'm gonna leave you smart
there is a nerve on digit three
that leads right to the heart

and what's up with that bridal kiss ?
i'm gonna set ya straight
in olden days, they did much more
folks watched 'em consummate

and why is it a honeymoon ?
i'm gonna spill, i am
cause honey causes thoughts of lust
and for a month, they'd cram

they're watered down the marriage rites
till now they are a bore
i'd rather see the kinds of things
they did in days of yore