The Whip

By Chinobus

Mon, 07 Jan 2013
  • 1033 reads
4 comments
 

Suffering consumes my very being for a fitting sentence,
I was judged wrong but given a brutal pennance,
for only doing what I was told yet never could perfect.
As it rips my exanguanated soul from my torso,
dangling of a gruelling ledge with nowhere to go,
the whips sickening snap continues to break me.
Laying down before your coal eyes with crooked smile,
unfeeling anger resides within me biting wild,
your apology falls on the ears of past deaths.
Locked away in a living dream of jeweled hope,
cannot stop my shaken love so I valiently cope,
sewn together with grainy memories of spritely happiness.
Golden light fills the room the next uncertain day,
your honey sweet promise of reform will find a way,
but the marks I am given will not allow us to reconcile.

Certificate 15
Poem
Poetry
Miscellaneous

Comments

Submitted by Bee on
I recognize and understand many of the emotions expressed here. Hope the writing helps. Bee
Bee

Submitted by Chinobus on
Thank you Bear and other readers! To explain a few subjects, ?exanguenated? means to drain entirely of blood or energy. Unfeeling anger represents the internal conflict between the victims feelings towards the abuser but cannot express them since it would only cause more harm from the abuser. It explains the passivity of the victim trying to rebel but cannot act since the victim has repressed love towards the abuser. On most occasions this rings true to real life situations between victims of abuse and their abusers; the inability to move on out of love, anger, and fear. Its a harsh subject that I personally experienced and survived better from this distant situation. As far as my grammatical errors I free write and dont really worry about "screw ups" although some readers find this very annoying. My personal beleif is that the most memorable words are the ones you say in the moment, not about what you contemplate afterwards. Thanks again and best of luck in all your works writing friends. Appreciate your thoughts. - Chinobus -

- Chinobus -

Submitted by Chinobus on
Thank you Bear and other readers! To explain a few subjects, ?exanguenated? means to drain entirely of blood or energy. Unfeeling anger represents the internal conflict between the victims feelings towards the abuser but cannot express them since it would only cause more harm from the abuser. It explains the passivity of the victim trying to rebel but cannot act since the victim has repressed love towards the abuser. On most occasions this rings true to real life situations between victims of abuse and their abusers; the inability to move on out of love, anger, and fear. Its a harsh subject that I personally experienced and survived better from this distant situation. As far as my grammatical errors I free write and dont really worry about "screw ups" although some readers find this very annoying. My personal beleif is that the most memorable words are the ones you say in the moment, not about what you contemplate afterwards. Thanks again and best of luck in all your works writing friends. Appreciate your thoughts. - Chinobus -

- Chinobus -

Submitted by maggyvaneijk on
Powerful and painful, you have an unrivalled way with words Chinobus.