Voices now and then

Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think I could publish a book, yes I know it was self publish, but I did it; in spite of the fear of making a mess of it all. Egg on your face is never a good feeling is it?

It isn't that many years ago when the thought of even turning on a computer would have me fleeing from the college ?omputer room; hoping I wouldn't be missed. However, if I was pass my Btech in caring computers just had to be faced.

I recall the terror I felt in mathematic classes; I'd sit somewhere near the back; heart thumping and dreading being targeted by the teacher. Double math's was feared from the day before. Computer understanding followed; I foolishly thought that as a child adults didn't feel fear, didn't get bullied and that they would always be in control. I now realise that this was a fantasy but somehow, in spite of painful experiences and loss I fitted in and felt Miss/Mrs Average. There is nothing wrong with being average but I feel we all lose out if we don't try.

I knocked so many doors during the five years of interviewing, typing and then making corrections before returning to the person I'd interviewed. Some of their stories I couldn't use but everything helped me to understand the town that I had struggled to grow up in.

I think it's only dawned on me recently that ther stories might have a wider appeal than just Finedon. However, World Wars; poverty, loss, destruction and resolution makes me think that maybe I was wrong. Wedding dresses made from parachute silk and cardboard wedding cakes must have been happening everywhere.
There was the memory of a lady making fishbone jelly and another of how women made pillow lace in the yards. Water running down sitting room walls, cockroaches being swept down the stairs. Voices now and then (which I will call my next re-printed book) seems an appropriate title.

I would like to say that had my lovely father James Hopper Nesbitt died when I was eight and my losing contact with my paternal family for decades I wouldn't have felt this burning need to leave some history or my town behind.
If anyone knows anything about the Nesbitt familyI I would be truly delighted to hear from them so that I can have a clearer picture about my paternal family.
best wishes and thanks
Audrey Esther