Shop Window
By amy451
- 858 reads
My first date
Well when I first walked past the shop it was heaven the dress that I wanted was right there in front of my a glamorous top and the skirt was so nice infant my favourite part of the dress! I started walking past it because I knew that when that first date with the boy that I knew was the Mr.Right for me that dress would be on me and it would just be perfect day ever!
While I was walking past my dream dress I bumped into him. I went bright red and knelt down to pick up all of my homework from school. He did the same to help me, it was the exactly the same as in the movies I love him he is the man of my dreams. We look into each others eyes and then he...
To be continued ...
comment and I will write the end xxx. Please tell me if you enjoyed this story and comment if you would like me to write another one and what about even if it is what has happened to you it could be anything embarrassing or not whatever !
By the way these stories are from my imagination and are not real x
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Comments
Hi Amy, do tell what happened
Hi Amy, do tell what happened next. Does this mean she was wearing unwashed jeans when she met the hottest man of her life? The kind of thing that happens to me.
One sentence needs some revision and you may want to insert commas: 'my a glamorous top and the skirt was so nice infant my favourite part of the dress!' Think it's meant to read as 'me, a glamorous top and the skirt was so nice, in fact, my favourite part of the dress.'
Nice to meet you and keep writing.
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I know a lot of children who
I know a lot of children who are in years nine and ten who can't write as well as this. Keep going Amy!
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I'm sorry - I posted
I'm sorry - I posted duplicate comments on here in error and deleted one. Now your comment's vanished, Amy. Feel like Mr Tumble. Unsure what's happened. Anyway, scratch is right. I want to know what happens on the date.
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