The Dragon of Nottingham - Extraordinary Cat

The Extraordinary Cat leapt from trash can to trash can at a dazzling speed in pursuit of the notorious cat catcher Señor Cody Coyote.

The wily cat catcher ran with the speed of a leopard while clutching a Calico kitten between its teeth, but was no match for our hero.

"Drop it I say!" said Extraordinary Cat. "Or I'll be forced to extend my super cat claws and give you the thrashing of a lifetime!"

Señor Coyote misjudged his next step and found himself flat on his back in the stench filled alley. The Calico kitten narrowly escaped with his life and left Señor Coyote gasping in frustration.

Towering over the wily one like a majestic Greek god stood Extraordinary Cat.

"I have you now, fiendish one!"

"Please to be letting me go, your Extraordinarness! As you can see I am no longer having the pussycat in my teeth! I was only meaning to show Calico kitten what a fine prancer is the Senor Cody Coyote! He was enjoying the moment I assure you most graciously!”

“You lie, you fiendish dog!,” said Extraordinary Cat. “Once again you have been foiled in your evil attempt to enslave the alley cat population! Now off with you! And never darken my heroic shadow again!”

Isaac‘s dad stopped reading the comic book and turned to his son.

“Hmm. I thought you’d be sleeping by now. But as long as you’re up, I must tell you that this comic book of yours is so awful that I’m actually beginning to enjoy its awfulness. Wouldn’t it be great if people talked like that in real life. Can you imagine?”

The family that exclaimed together were dining at a neighborhood restaurant.

"Unhand that sugar bowl, you sugar-soaked urchin!"” said the mom. ""You'll not put us in the poor house with yet another visit to that over-priced tooth yanker Dr. Goldfilling! Now eat your limpy asparagus spears and pass me some of that fine looking soggy spinach that has been soaking in its own juices for the past several hours!"

"And, waiter!" said the dad. "Another platter of mutton all around! For tonight we celebrate Procoucious Isaac's acceptance into Major Rigid's Military Summer Camp for Irascible Youth!"

“Congratulations!" said the waiter. “You must be quite the awful child!"

“What is this I’m hearing!” said the four-year-old. “I beseech thee to tell me more of this betrayal of what was to be my joy-filled Summer in the sun! Pray tell! Why do you throw me to the wolves!"

"There! There!” said the dad. “You will love Major Rigid and his Squadron of Gigantic Disciplinarians! Yes! They are sure to steal all the joy out of your sumer! But you will come out a four-year-old who is better equipped to deal with the harsh realities of nursery-school life!”

“It’s for your own good, dear,” said the mom in an uncharacteristic, non-exclamatory moment. “Now eat your Brussels sprouts!”

Isaac the Precocious closed his eyes with all his might and made a mighty wish.

“What is that rumbling!” cried the dad.

“Why, it must be an earthquake!” cried the mom.

As the restaurant shook from its foundation to the rafters, the table at which they sat ascended to great heights, weaving to and fro at a frightening speed.

As the mom and dad grabbed hold of the chandelier, the table fell to the floor with a thunderous crash, revealing that of a monstrous two-headed dragon.

”Oh, Isaac!” cried the mom. ”Reach for Mommy‘s hand!”

“My dear people!” cried the waiter. “We do not allow pets in the restaurant!”

But their fears were for naught, as they watched Isaac the Precocious hold tight to the dragon’s wings and take flight.

“I’ll shall meet thy parents back at the humble dwelling we call home!” said the precocious one. “Last one home is a much rottener egg than I! Dragon, away!”