Barcelona Midnight

By pleurotus

Fri, 24 Apr 2015
  • 814 reads
3 comments
 

Lovers sit in pairs
on moonlight-less beaches
I hear six languages
at the same time
it feels like 7:30am
but it is dark
and I struggle to
find comfortability
with loneliness

Certificate 12
Poem
Romance
Nature
Miscellaneous
Love
Journal

Comments

Submitted by a102866 on

I loved the juxtaposition as everybody on the beach hears the same sounds, whatever the number in their party, and the languid, lonely effect that is only felt by one non-conformist. I think that the word "comfortability' in the next to the last line is not a good fit. The word "conformity" would sound better. Even so, I enjoyed the contrasting feelings that the beach scene elicited. A well-conceived poem!

Submitted by Jane Hyphen on

I agree with a102866 re conformity nevertheless an interesting little piece I enjoyed. Barcelona such a wonderful place but can imagine that kind of loneliness preying on people.

 

Submitted by Philip Sidney on

I quite like the awkwardness of 'comfortability' and 'moonlight-less', seems to refelect the feelings in the poem.