Chamomile Tea, Narrative #3
By StillFoundation
- 1125 reads
Camping on Earth
Chamomile Tea tried to reassure SayLeece. They stood on the sandy beach in the special cove near the ocean, their small hut just obscured with the nearby trees. SayLeece (whos voice sounded like the singsong birds that flew by in the morning) knelt bending at her slener waist. Her golden saucer was ready on the beach, the sun in the blue sky reflecting golden off its dome. The two sentient felines stood waiting. SayLeece looked at Chamomile Tea, “Are you sure you will be OK without me?”
“Yes mother, I am sure! -I know I will be! I am old enough to be alone, plus I know you must return to gather your scientific supplies.”
“..I will be gone for possibly weeks before I return..”
“I know,” insisted Chamomile Tea, “I am ready for this!” She knew her mother could be stubborn.
“I know you are,” SayLeece’s eyes softened. “I know you will makes friends while I am away.” SayLeece's voice was crystalline and soothing. “I will leave you with a gift.” GateKeeper with warm fur and soft eyes, moved forward pulling with his mouth the leather handle of a small cedar chest. Gate Keeper’s eyes had vertical slits just like Chamomile Tea’s and in them she read the telepathic messages. A gift until we all return, our daughter, worry not we will be back soon.
SayLeece continued, “I know you want to live here on this planet, but my experiments back on Sirius...”
“-I know.” Chamomile re-assured, “I want to sway here. I know you will return. I never enjoyed space travel like you do. I want to plant me feet on solid ground. And besides, I never did enjoy the temperature on Sirius as much as you either.. -it is so cold! I like earth! Look at all this!” She drew her hand across the scenery. “Blue water! Green Hills! And golden sunlight! I may still be an infant, but I am old enough to be alone! It will be like camping! It will be like adventure! You must convince Grandfather Lizard to bring my orphan brother here to earth!
“I am sure Katulu will make his choice to come to earth soon. He just needs time to make his choice. Ah yes you where always the destined for a place like earth.. you are grounded. You where always ready for earth before Katulu was.”
It was decided then. Chamomile Tea could see that her mother was satisfied that she would be able to take care of herself. She wrapped her arms around her mothers slender waist, and then hugging both of the felines, burying her face in their soft fur. She would miss her very special family, the beautiful gently yellow-haired GateKeeper and the sleek black graceful Cleopatra, but she was also excited to have an adventure alone, and didn’t want her mother to worry.
“Look for my ship on your next name day above the mountain." Sayleece said, "...And remember... although I may be worlds away, I will always be with you. The feline’s maintain the link with you in your dreams. When you think of us we will hear your thoughts.”
“Is there anything I can do while you are gone to better prepare for Katulu’s arrival?”
“We have already done much. We have built a built a hut of driftwood. The main important thing is that you must be here when he arrives. You must be the first one he sees when he arrives.”
Soon she left with the two felines, and her ship shot into the sky, jumping to the top of the mountain to pause, and then ricocheting off into the depths of the blue sky as if unhinged from the laws of gravity. ...And then Chamomile Tea was alone. There was a peace in the air and the wind gently blew in her yellow hair. Before she turned back to the short trail to the hut she walked to the water’s edge and out across the cove and breathed in the salt breeze. Who wouldn’t want to live on this planet? It is like a special sanctuary! She told herself, but a shiver ran up her spine.
She wondered how long it would be until Katulu arived. She wondered how it would be to sleep in bed without the warm bodies of the felines to keep her warm. Surely only the first night would be strange, she reassured herself. With her feet she poked at the sand and smooth stones at the water’s edge, and dipper just one of her toes in the cool water.
She turned back and grabbed the chest that SayLeece had for her by the roap handles. Diggering he feet into the sand she dragged it the shrot distance up the beach and all along the short dirt path to the froont doorway of her hut.
That night in her hut she tried to sleep but when she closed here eyes she could feel the whole cove, outside of the hut, silent and expansive. She rolled over to look out the round windows. It was dark out there but with her catlike vision she could barely make out the muky shapes of trees. She imagined what aminals and creatures lived out there. She imagined all the spiders that must live in the tree branches – how their heat sensitive eyes must be able to see her – looking in her windows sensing her body heat with their x-ray vision. She thought she could see their eyes looking in. She rolled over to look at the wall and closed her eyes. The sounds of insects finally lulled her to sleep.
Late in the night she dreampt her re-occurring dream of the young orphan Katulu. He toddled towards her on a field of green grass and yellow flowers that swayed in the wind. The strange backdrop was a deep blue sky. He picked a yellow dandelion flower. He held it out to her, a smile in his crooked mouth. She could see it's reflected in his deep watery turtle-like eyes. Was she dreaming she was on earth? or was this another place? It was so much like the first time she had set eyes upon him.
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Comments
Again, this is very readable
Again, this is very readable but it needs a big edit - it's full of typos which interrupt the reader's pace.
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I was looking for Chapter 2 -
I was looking for Chapter 2 - I thought at first it might be wrong numbering but there does seem to be a gap from where we left Chapter 1. Agree with Insert about the editing - the typos are getting in the way of the reader's enjoyment.
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The spelling and grammar
The spelling and grammar thing can be a bind, and the main thing is that the writing is strong. Even with spellcheck the beasties creep through and none of us is immune. As long as you're OK with us giving the pointers, we'll continue to do so!
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