A Game of Scones

Queen Percei ordered her cream tea, then sat there all regal like, while she waited for it to arrive.

Her cross-dressing brother, Myrion, ordered his cream tea and drank three bottles of wine, while he waited for his to arrive.

The waiter brought Queen Percei her scone plus a pot of jam and cream, then brought Myrion his scone plus a pot of jam and cream.

Queen Percei, who was part-Cornish, cut her scone in half, then spread jam on both halves, then cream on top of the jam.

Myrion, who was not part-Cornish, cut his scone in half, then spread cream on both halves, then jam on top of the cream.

Queen Percei’s eyebrows raised.

Queen Percei gestured towards her bodyguard, who was known as The Foothill, who picked up Myrion (who was quite short) and crushed him like a bug.

“In the Game of Scones,” said Queen Percei, “you either win or you die.”