The Journey. Part Two.
By Maxine Jasmin-Green
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Having just seen the text on the group chat that my beloved Auntie died in the wee small hours, we knew it was coming but it was still a shock. Mum was given a small amount of food and a cuppa so that she could take her regular morning tablets. Then we were out to my cousin’s house. While I was driving there, my mobile rang, I stopped to answer the call, it was my cousin, she said, “Where are you?” I replied, “On my way to yours,” She said, “The private ambulance wanted to collect Mum at 9am but we asked then if they could come a little later as we wanted Auntie to see her Sister first before she went, they will get another person first then collect Mum at 10am,” I said, “We will be there in ten minutes.” We arrived and again the house was full, most were in their pyjamas, and crying. Mum was helped upstairs, and was again given a seat next to the bed, I joined her too, it was very surreal, for Auntie looked the same as yesterday, but her tummy and heart area, didn’t seem to be moving as much as it was yesterday. For I could have sworn I saw her breathing, as did others, but that was just our imagination.
Again, Mum said, “Open your eyes, I know you want to.” My cousin who supports Mum here with her personal care, sat next to Mum and said, “She’s gone Auntie,” My cousin continued to whisper into my Mum’s ear, but my Mum was having none of it, so then my older male cousin sat next to Mum, and tried to help Mum grasp what she could see, from a different point of view, then while he was still speaking, we heard Mum said, “Goodnight, my Sister,” Myself and one of my brothers was on the Landing just outside the bedroom door, as were other people, I hadn’t cried, which I did think was a bit odd, but I’ve always been a private person and save my tears where possible until I’m alone, then suddenly we heard my Mum crying very loud, and she was shouting, “GOODNIGHT, MY SISTER, I LOVE YOU” We all gathered around Mum, my brother and my cousins, I was by Mum’s knees on the floor holding on to Mum, everyone in the room was crying and me too, We all felt for her, for all of us kids, had only known Mum and Auntie the same as our ages, but Mum and Auntie have known each other for over eighty six years! That’s more than a lifetime. Poor Mummy.
Then the private ambulance arrived and we were told we had to leave the bedroom, there was lots of shoes at the bottom of the stairs, I had wondered why, I was informed, I assumed it was some sort of custom that I had not heard of, but as I had no socks on, I had no intention of removing my shoes! That would have freaked me out. So, all the shoes were quickly removed and put into the front room. To make way for the men and their black stretcher. Mum and others came down the stairs in floods of tears, and Mum was put in the front room near the door so she would be able to see her sister for the last time as she came down the stairs. After about five minutes the black stretcher with Auntie inside was carefully carried down the stairs, All my cousins were crying now, Alice who cares for my Mum was crying the loudest in the whole house, she was almost hysterical, it was such a sad scene, the pain they were all feeling, I felt so helpless, as I was unable to comfort them. Death is the worst thing ever! I took Mum to the window so she could see her sister being put into the ambulance, others were already outside. Then Auntie was gone. I was going back to Mum’s but as I was driving off, my brother who had cried, buckets at the sight of Auntie, Matt, he flashed his lights for me to stop, so I did, and he asked me, “Do you and Mum want to come back to mine for the day?” I said, “Yes, that would be lovely,” So, I followed him to his lovely, peaceful home.
It so happened I was sleeping with Mum all that week, and the following morning, while we were still in bed and had just woken up, Mum said to me, “I wonder how my sister is?” I looked at my lovely, clever, Mummy, an Intensive Care Nurse all her working life, and I said, while sitting up on my elbow while looking down on her, “Mum your sister died yesterday, remember you saw her, in the bed?” Mum looked at me genuinely shocked! Her mouth fell open. On the group chat, they were texting me to ask, while we were still in bed, “How’s Auntie?” “How’s Mum?” I replied, “Mum asked me this morning how’s my sister?”
In fact, Mum asked throughout the days, the same question to her kids and nieces and nephews, “How is my sister?” Every day, Mum was told she has died. Then on the fourth day, Mum took out her tiny note pad that she keeps in her handbag, she said to me, “What is the date today?” I told her, and Mum wrote in her tiny note pad, when she was finished, she read to me what she had just written down, “I have just been told that my sister has died.” I love my Mum SO much, there was nothing I could add to her statement.
I wasn’t there, but three weeks before my Auntie died, she was talking to my brother, and she said, “I want a pink coffin,” Mum and Auntie was also discussing that they wanted to be buried together, I‘m glad I wasn’t there, some of Auntie’s kids was also there, Mum said, “I want to be buried on top,” Auntie had smiled and replied, “That’s fine by me, just as long as you make it to Heaven.”
Two weeks later I saw my cousins and asked, “Is there a dress code?” I was informed, “No wear whatever you want to”, I replied, “I have a multi coloured pink dress, that I will be wearing then,” He replied, “That’s great.” One of my brothers has been asked to be a pallbearer, and Mum will be in the funeral car, she has been told. The wheelchair has been booked and hired for the day for Mum for the burial site.
Mum and Auntie had been back home three months. RIP Auntie. xXx
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Comments
I'm so sorry for your loss
I'm so sorry for your loss Grace. What a wonderful, supportive family you have. It's really good that you were all able to be there for each other
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That was a very interesting
That was a very interesting read. How lovely that your mum and auntie were so close and supported each other and were able to live out their retirement in a sunny place. Sorry for your loss. It was insightful to read about the all the stages of their later life and how you as a family related to each other.
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