The Fall and Rise of...Archibald Thurble?

Concluding the festive four-part trilogy(!) that began with Drumming Up The Christmas Trade!, followed by A Subsequent Engagement? and then The Trouble with Horace Dimchurch

The following morning, Archibald made sure that he was at work bright and early.  Knowing what was about to unfold, he wanted to make sure he had a ring-side seat for the downfall of Horace Dimchurch.  He tried one or two different spots before he finally found a position in the workroom that gave him an unfettered view of Josiah Oakshott’s office door, without making it too obvious that the area was under surveillance.

From the low moans emanating from the office, it was apparent that Horace was in residence, so he had either made a ridiculously early start, or, more likely, had never raised the enthusiasm to go home in the first place.  After a while, Archibald heard the familiar sound of Josiah Oakshott’s car coming in through the gates, heard it park and the sound of two car doors shutting.  He rubbed his hands in glee and waited for the fireworks to start.  He watched Josiah and Samantha sweep into Josiah’s office, heard a yelp of surprise from Horace, then the door closed and all that could be heard was the low rumble of conversation.  He kept expecting shouts to commence and door-slamming to be begin, but he was disappointed.  The low rumble continued for some time and then the door opened and Horace appeared, clutching a raft of papers to his chest and looking dejected.  He then fetched his coat and walked out of the premises. 

Whilst all this was very interesting, it didn’t have quite the dramatic content Archibald had hoped for.  He felt a bit cheated, actually.  After all, there was little point in being the only person in the business who knew what was going to happen, if it didn’t happen!  He was trying to think of some pressing need to go into Mr. Oakshott’s office, so that he could find out what had occurred, but couldn’t think of anything convincing.  He was then surprised to note that Horace Dimchurch had re-entered the building and was making his way back to Mr. O.’s office.  From Archibald’s point of view, this was an unexpected plot twist and he settled down to see if there would be fireworks this time.  Again, however, he was disappointed.  There were more low conversational tones, even some chuckling and then the door opened to reveal a smiling Horace Dimchurch, who once more left the building.

This was more than Archibald could stand.  Once was bad enough but this second bout of pleasantries just seemed to be rubbing his nose in it!  He looked at his watch and decided that he could just about justify an early morning coffee.  He hurried to the kitchenette, threw together a coffee and a plate of biscuits, and hastened to his employer’s office.

Knocking on the door, he was surprised to hear Josiah intone “Come in, Archibald!”  He poked his head around the door, to see Josiah in his familiar place behind the desk with Samantha Knight draped on a chair beside him.

“How did you know it was me?”  Archibald queried.

“It was inevitable, Archibald” Josiah grinned, “given the comings and goings of Mr. Dimchurch”

“Oh, well, any road, here’s your coffee” Archibald marched over and placed the tray on the desk, “I’m sorry, Ms. Knight, I didn’t put you a cup, do you want me to get one?”  He made to leave the office.

“No, that’s fine, Archibald” Samantha smiled at him, warmly, “I’m quite capable of getting my own refreshments” She looked pointedly at Josiah, who blushed a little.

“I presume, Archibald, that the early arrival of my morning coffee is somewhat related to your need to know what has transpired with Mr. Dimchurch, would I be correct?”  Josiah asked, eyebrows raised.

“No, no” Archibald shook his head, furiously, “nowt to do with me, is it?  Just wanted to make sure you’d had your coffee”

“Of course,” Josiah’s response dripped with sarcasm, “so you would not, for instance, be interested to learn the headlines of our meeting with Mr. Dimchurch?”

“Well,” Archibald shrugged, “if you wanted to tell me, then yeah, I suppose so” He attempted to look unconcerned, and failed.

“Oh, stop teasing him, Josiah!” Samantha scolded, with a grin.

“Well, I cannot give you a verbatim account of our conversation, as that would be a breach of privacy, however…” Josiah began.

“I thought you were going to tear a strip off of him!” Archibald interrupted, unable to contain himself any longer.

“Yes, that was my original intention,” Josiah agreed, somewhat sheepishly, “however, Ms. Knight…Samantha, convinced me that Mr. Dimchurch’s obvious failings were partly my own fault, for not having ensured that he had been properly trained and given the relevant work experience”

“You’d have had to have found him first” Archibald chuckled.

“Be that as it may,” Josiah nodded, “when I spoke to Mr. Dimchurch, first thing this morning, I apologised to him for the suddenness of his temporary promotion and for his lack of preparation.  I thanked him for taking on the onerous task at such short notice…”

“Onerous?” Archibald spluttered, “he did nowt but hole himself up in your office, moaning!”

“Nevertheless…” Josiah said, firmly, “having thanked him, I told him that I wanted to take appropriate remedial action and that, therefore, I would be taking a personal interest in his further development within the Company”

“You didn’t?”  Archibald tittered. “How did he take it?”

“Indeed, I did” Josiah grinned, “he seemed to find this news somewhat…overwhelming.  He whimpered a little and left shortly after, but not before seeking permission to go home and see his wife to discuss the matter”

“I’ll bet he did!” Archibald chortled. “He looked like he’d lost a bob and found a tanner when he came out of the office.  Not that I was looking, mind” He hastened to add.

“On his return,” Josiah continued, “he advised me that, following discussions with his wife, they had decided that an early retirement would be in his best interests, I naturally said that we would be sorry to see him go…”

“You didn’t even know who he was!” Archibald exclaimed.

… but we would, of course, respect his decision, so we agreed that he could leave his employment with immediate effect” Josiah steepled his fingers and looked rather like the cat that had got the cream.

“Well, I’ll go to the foot of our stairs!” Archibald shook his head slowly and plonked himself into the guest chair, before leaping up again and saying “Sorry Ms. Knight, I didn’t mean to presume…”

“Not at all, Archie, please do be seated” Samantha beamed at him, “I think Josiah has something he wants to discuss with you, anyway”

“Ah yes!” Josiah coughed and shuffled some papers about on his desk, “erm, Ms. Knight has pointed out to me that it took a considerable degree of initiative, on your part, to alert me to the situation here at Oakshott and Underwood, when you came to see us, yesterday”

“Oh, it was nowt” Archibald said, dismissively.

“I think it was rather more than that, Archie,” Samantha said, kindly, “without your intervention, the business could have soon been in rather serious trouble, and we would have been blissfully unaware”

“Well, if you put it like that…” Archibald blushed.

“Ms. Knight has a valid point” Josiah nodded, “she also holds the view that I rather take your dedication to the business somewhat for granted”

“Well, to be fair, I’ve co…made a mess of a few things, an’ all” Archibald admitted, sheepishly.

“We all make mistakes, Archie” Samantha smiled warmly at him.

“To get to the point” Josiah gave her a meaningful look, “Ms. Knight believes that it is unfair of me to treat you as a…?”

“Glorified tea boy, is what I think I said, Josiah” Samantha grinned.

“Oh, I don’t mind, honest I don’t” Archibald interjected.

“Nevertheless, she has convinced me that you should be properly rewarded for your initiative” Josiah explained.

“Oh, well, if you fancy bunging me a few bob extra in my wages?” Archibald suggested, tentatively, with a grin.

“I think we can do rather better than that” Josiah shook his head, “Ms. Knight is of the opinion, and I agree with her, that you should study for your professional qualification”

“WHAT?” Archibald yelped.

“It would give you a real career within the industry, Archie, rather than just a job” Samantha explained.

“But…but…I’m alright as I am, honest!” Archibald spluttered, “I don’t need no career”

“It would also give you, and your fiancée, Ms. Ryder, a point of commonality” Josiah said.

“It’d do what?” Archibald looked puzzled.

“It would be something you and Electra would have in common” Samantha interpreted, “you would share a common goal.  That would have to be good for your relationship, surely?”

“Oh, well, I suppose so?” Archibald admitted, doubtfully.

“Ms. Knight will contact the local college today to secure a place for you” Josiah smiled, warmly, “I want you to know that I’m very grateful for all of your help, Archibald.”

“Well, that’s really kind, Mr. O. but, you see” Archibald took a deep breath, “I was never much good at school.  I could never pass things, you know?  I’m not sure if this would suit me?”  He said, glumly.

“You will be fine, Archie” Samantha said, firmly, “and Josiah and I will be here to help you, if you need us, as, I’m sure, will Electra”

“Strictly between you and I, at the moment, Archibald” Josiah said, “Ms. Knight is to become the firm’s Training and Development Manager, in addition to her other duties, so she will be very keen to monitor your progress.  This is, of course, a matter which will be officially announced to the rest of the workforce in due course, so I would appreciate your discretion regarding this, and your proposed studies”

“Yeah, yeah, ‘course” Archibald nodded, distractedly.

“Well done, Archie!” Samantha beamed at him.

“Don’t let us detain you further” Josiah suggested, looking down at the paperwork on his desk, “I’m sure you have plenty of other things to be getting on with?”

“Oh yeah, right” Archibald nodded and made his way out of the office.

He plodded down the passage, miserably.  ‘How could it be’ he wondered, ‘that you’re given a pat on the back, yet it felt like you’d been kicked in the teeth?’  He shook his head, glumly.  He’d never exactly had, what you might call, ambition, and now, here it was, being thrust upon him!  ‘Perhaps that’s why all these bosses look so miserable all the time?’ He pondered, ‘Maybe they’d been happily making tea and stuff and then someone said “Here, you can’t do that all your life, get yourself educated and run the business!”  It was enough to make a pig whistle, it really was!’