Extreme differences!

Cherry

By Rhiannonw

Tue, 25 Jun 2024
  • 971 reads
17 comments
 

The elephant is heavy, the feather is light,
the elephant is grey, the feather is white.
The elephant walks on earth,
the feather can fly
if it’s fixed to a bird
up in the sky.

It would be absurd
for an elephant to fly
He’s far to heavy for life in the sky
He strides around on solid ground.

He’s big, the feather is small.
The elephant can roar,
but the feather floats down, free-slow-fall,
silent
as it drops off the bird –
the bird and the elephant are both alive,
but the feather is not,
though not really dead,
just shed
like the hair that I comb from my head.

[IP: light, last week – heavy]

Certificate U
Poem
For children
Children's
Inspiration Point (work that responds to our weekly writing cue)

Comments

Submitted by Insertponceyfre... on

nice IP response Rhiannon - a good way to illustrate the concepts to children

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Thank you, it was a bit of fun to get it into something neat and fun and twisty/rhymey. I like child-like simplicity! It started emerging last week! Rhiannon

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

This is a brilliant response to the I P Rhiannon.

I also like the rhythm and rhyme too.

Jenny.

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

thanks, Jenny. I do like rhythm and rhyme when they help, not being heavy. Rhiannon

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

And thank you for the cherries. Rhiannon

 

Submitted by Turlough on

Great words and great rhymes Rhiannon.

You got me singing...

I saw a peanut stand, heard a rubber band
And seen a needle wink its eye
But I be done seen about everything
When I see an elephant fly

Turlough

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Thank you.

We actually watched Dumbo quite recently when we were on holiday and the DVD was in the cottage we were in, but I'm very slow picking up all the lyrics and catching their jokes, so I googled those lyrics now! Rhiannon

 

Submitted by Turlough on

My kids had the Dumbo video when they were little, plus several others of the same ilk,so all of those songs are permanently embossed on my brain.

If I could remember who bought them Dinky the Duck (a 1940s classic, apparently) I would bear a grudge, but I can't, so I don't. It's the most irritating music in the history of the world and just writing this reply has started it up again in my head.

I doubt I'll sleep tonight. 

laugh

Turlough

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

There's a fine lne between simple and clever, and irritating isn't there? And the irritating ones can cling in the brain! Rhiannon

 

Submitted by Di_Hard on

Loved the rhyming :0) And I liked the distinction you make that unlike the bird it comes from, the feather is not alive - they can seem so, if trying to catch one as it falls! And how you show that feathers are like hairs, which a child might have fun understanding :0)

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Thanks, Di for picking out those things. I enjoyed how it came out in the end! Rhiannon

 

Submitted by marandina on

"The elephant is heavy, the feather is light,
the elephant is grey, the feather is white."

There's a lovely, lilting rhythm to this. Nicely done, Rhiannon.

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

thank you. Rhiannon

 

Submitted by Tom Brown on

The elephant and ant were walking together over the bridge, the ant said "We make this bridge shake hey?!"

We usually say an elephant "trumpets" or such, but you can say "roar" if you like why not?

Keep well, greetings from Africa! Tom

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

smiley Yes, I had read 'roar' used, but come to think of it we do hear the word 'trumpet' used more often.

thanks, Rhiannon

 

Submitted by hudsonmoon on

Ha. thaks, Rhiannon. That was fun for a Sunday morning, or any morning. x

Rich

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Glad to give enjoyment! Thanks. Rhiannon