What's happening to our forums?

i'm in!

I blame Lord Coe. Everyone's after their golden cherry, nobody's happy to just take part any more. It's too competitive, I caught people throwing javelins at one of my stories yesterday.

It would be wise for people to understand where Natalia's coming from. She's making a very good point, and her own admission that she feels like joining in the jerkfest just goes to show how meanness and spite are infectious. I don't think it's right to make fun of her post even if she has only been here for a few weeks. Perhaps that's the point. Forum topics can show the personality of a site and if the last two weeks are anything to go by and I'd taken a look as a newbie, I would have thought it would be the last site on earth I'd join. I talk about Abctales to people when I do signings at bookshops every weekend but if the forum topics remain as mean-hearted and soul-draining as they have recently been, I won't be mentioning it to anybody, which would be a shame because this site has been a constant source of love and enjoyment for me during what has been and still is the most challenging time of my life. I wouldn't be surprised if Bryan Skylar was an alias of someone very well known on the site, but perhaps that I could even think such a thing indicates just how wrong certain parts of this site have become. On the whole, nastiness hurts the agggressor as much as the target, and gets both parties absolutely nowhere. Tell me to get a laugh or chill out or loosen up if you want but I've had it with this crap.

couldn't agree more with you blighters rock

When I joined, the guide lines were to accept that everybody writes the best they can and the product is their baby. It doesn't hurt to be polite about something. If you disagree then ignore it! Alternatively try and be helpful, constructive criticism is usually welcomed.

I think you can isolate it to one or two threads (that I saw, anyway), where it was obvious who was in the wrong. Why good and well meaning people are apologising is beyond me. The things that were said to you, Stan, and others, were offensive. Don't apologise for standing your ground mate. It's just as damaging to the site when someone like BS says that no one comments on their work or helps them with their writing in a public place like the forum. That simply wasn't true. Bear has got the idea, and he/she is getting something positive out of it. Maybe the only thing those people who bit back at BS were guilty of was not ignoring someone who was clearly not worth their time. In retrospect, I stuck my oar in unnecessarily, but those who tried to help BS and got it thrown back in their faces have every right to be offended. Natalia, this site is brilliant, and will continue to be so. There will also continue to be disagreements between people from time to time. It's not a slant on the site, it's just what happens in life and on the internet. Right, now, no more confrontation for me. It makes me feel bad. Much love to all :)

Browsing through the posts I haven't seen a negative comment yet, ... Bear shush, don't give us ideas :-)

ItsSteveDave has got it about right. Perhaps new members should read and inwardly digest. I've been singing my little heart out Sooz, where are those knickers???? ;-))) Terry

new to all. It is an amazing site,when I started, no knowledge 2009. But I feel if anyone, wants to barter with each other,let it go! after two answers. AbcTales Editor t.cook will deal with all in a gentle way. Sometimes it is like a boxing ring,some people sensitive and fragile. But help of all and to read many poem and stories,of others is the answer! If stuck on a comment,don't answer. Say don't know! can't help you,must go! maybe, cos get's out of hand,even in jest way maybe! I have found so many help me,and our Editor t.cook (Tony) when first came on,2009 just to enter comp; but homeless group writing etc; typed all and posted The big issue then all ages paid. Staff concerned read. We never worked computer hardly. First I came on,up came, in LARGE LETTERS.IN RED THIS WHATEVER! Should been in Forum,didn't know anything or anywhere how to work it! All cherries! first saw clicked on frightened me like hell! as never seen any and why! learn't as went a long. Think I would even get one cherry! I squealed,after try doing so many! Hubby actually painted one on? work I truly believed? wasn't so I was up very early clicked on,.there was the red cherry! after done so many. Tears he shouldn't jest about! doesn't read,any of my work I try,under adversity,everything many things,mind body spirit, had go through! Sometimes I don't understand things,or job to fathom out,but keep trying. I truly wish the site would lighten up! Nobody knows people's lives. That is my opinion. I have hubby criticises may spelt! wrong most things,much younger,depletes person I think! after 40 years marriage I still,never know what say,how it is mean't,with a sarcastic streak. One has to live someone,before we truly find out,mean't in nice way, what I have said. Everyday someone somewhere has problems,or hurting something facts of life! Even work now is causing stress! say bring in massages breaks,good idea too. I did poem on relaxation,all try,works I know? take care it is giving and sharing we grow! What ever hits,us deal with in any stages of life! cavalcaderl julie xx

i had a bought of spitefullness years ago here. its horrible, i hope they stop it. i feel that constructive crits are teh only way to go... and if you can't pick out the best bit and say, I like this bit!

OK I have had my head down with work for the past couple of weeks but if people are getting cruel in the forum then that is plain wrong. This is a wonderful free spirited site and people must be able to say what they feel but that does not mean upsetting people. FTSE for example brilliantly witty for example but never hurtful - there is no need for that.

Surely it should be 'fora'? (Sorry)

Oh my, what ever happened to peace, love and respect? It's getting a bit like reading Rushing to Paradise (or any number of that wonderfully human genre). David Cameroon will be providing military aid to one or other camps if it doesn't stop soon. I'm watching out for Kate Adie or Jeremy Bowen on the Who's New list.

I do keep a close eye on things - and when it gets out of hand I will act. We have, over the years, had occasional bouts of nastiness and I won't tolerate it. I used to think it was all adults acting as they do and people were big enough to deal with it. That isn't so. People, some of them very vulnerable, get hurt - and I will stop it.