Calendar Girls

Calendar Girls by Neil McCall

Language, mild:
Clearly not German or Arabic, then;
they've learnt to torture from the ears down.
Maybe a mellifluous skein of Tuscan
from night-schools in Skipton or Harrogate
melded with elvish
and broadened in limestone valleys.

Sex, moderate:
Ah, now we come to it,
weekends in Dales guesthouses;
creaky stairs, groaning beds and wonky floorboards
stealing our orgasms.
"Did you sleep well?" she asked knowingly
as she piled our plates high
with eggs and dead livestock.