EBOLOWA 38

Cherry

By simonmiller15

Mon, 25 Apr 2016
  • 1910 reads
9 comments
 

A much revised version of EBOLOWA will be on sale in book shops and online at Unbound.com.

Details to follow as and when.

many thanks meantime to readers at ABC

and good luck.

simon

Certificate 18
Story
EBOLOWA
Historical Fiction
Drama
Crime

Comments

Submitted by airyfairy on

I'm a newcomer to this story and just dipped in by chance, but I really enjoyed this part and I shall definitely go back and read the rest.  The tension is well done, especially with the airport official.  Very intrigued to know how we got here!

Submitted by simonmiller15 on

it's great to have you on board AF even from the wrong end of the telescope.  I don't think there's too great a danger of it spoiling it for you unless you have a very retentive memory!  Obviously I will be very interested to know if the dip and grip here works as well from the beginning.  Thanks anyway for such a positive reaction.  simon

Submitted by simonmiller15 on

Just a thought AF - - 38b is a short bit I couldn't squeeze in to main chapter 38.  Leave that and go straight to start - - there's some spoiling there.  simon

Submitted by simonmiller15 on

thanks Eds for the cherries.  Great to get them on the final stretch.  simon

Submitted by airyfairy on

Catching up with myself now...

Beth Palmer morphed into Beth Anderson at one point. 

Submitted by simonmiller15 on

Thanks again AF -- I thought I'd changed them all! Simon

Submitted by Sandy Hogarth on

Fitz blushing - don't need rest pf sentence. Blushing says it.

'Well he's...' Needs capital W.

Having never broken sound barrier...' Don't understand.

Submitted by Sandy Hogarth on

Fitz blushing - don't need rest pf sentence. Blushing says it.

'Well he's...' Needs capital W.

Having never broken sound barrier...' Don't understand.

Submitted by Sandy Hogarth on

Ist para - 'head high' bit cliched. And would she not be going over last night's eventsa in her head. Liked the last sentence.

O like Fitz and her clothing.

'Well,' not 'well'

The piece where Fitz calls Candace by her name works.

Customes search good, esp dialogue and like the explanation for delay.

Not sure I understand last few sentences.