Public Order and Private Dicks

I am a keen follower

of formulaic thrillers

the ones where cops

are thwarted by killers

who are far too clever

for the wooden-tops.

The ones which have

a world-weary D.I.

who with the rules

doesn't always comply

and who proudly boasts

that he is “old school”.

He is also quite fond

of excessive booze

that impairs deduction

and induces snooze.

The binge might cause

erectile dysfunction.

It seems his methods

are much too defective

and that what is wanted

is a private detective

who by the big challenge

will not be daunted.

One hopes the substitute

is not a clever dick

someone like Poirot

who gets on one's wick

but an unpretentious one

who doesn't crow.

Although the TV shows

are run-of-the-mill

and not always the best

they give me a thrill

so I watch that drivel

with great interest.

© Luigi Pagano 2020